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Rate the last film you watched out of 5


Raoull duke
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15 hours ago, Vimster said:

Creep (2014)

Interesting low-budget horror, sort of found-footage. A young fella gets a job filming a cancer sufferer who wants a record of his last few days for his son, or does he? Things definitely take a turn for the worst. Really low-key drama that builds slowly and rewards the patient viewer. Excellent twist ending. Difficult to talk about without spoiling it so I'll just say give this a spin if you like understated horror.

 

3/5

 

The jump scares are terrible. 

Spoiler

Literally BOO!

 

The ending is horrible.

 

I thought it was a decent take on the found footage genre.

Spoiler

That was 'kept' footage.

 

Detective Pikachu

First 20 mins were OK but the rest of the film was atrocious.

1/5

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Dumbo

 

After the horror that is The Lion King live action I approached this with some trepidation. I needn't of been worried. It's a first rate updating of the classic movie with a truly excellent cast who all give stellar performances. Particularly Keaton and Green (possibly my favourite performance of hers outside Penny Dreadful).

 

4/5

 

This Life

 

Second Keaton movie of the week. I avoided this at the time as Empire gave it 2/5 IIRC.  I thought it was extremely well written and far less schmaltzy than I was expecting. Keaton and Kidman were both very natural in their roles. It's all about a man who is  dying of cancer as his wife is pregnant. 

 

3.5/5

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London Has Fallen.

 

I've not seen the first but this came up on my Amazon Prime feed and we fancied something simple to waste an hour and a half so took a punt. Turns out this was both very simple and a complete and total waste of said hour and a half.

 

One of the worst films I have seen in many, many years although, to be fair, we are usually a bit more careful when choosing what to watch. An endless stream of inconceivably dumb, ridiculously implausible nonsense and not in a good way - just genuinely wall to wall stupid and some of the worst scripting, dialogue and plot imaginable even by the low standards of its genre. Hell, even the bombast was tarnished by some hopeless CGI.

 

I have no idea why we didn't just turn it off after fifteen minutes.

 

0/5.

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20 minutes ago, Mike S said:

London Has Fallen.

 

I've not seen the first but this came up on my Amazon Prime feed and we fancied something simple to waste an hour and a half so took a punt. Turns out this was both very simple and a complete and total waste of said hour and a half.

 

One of the worst films I have seen in many, many years although, to be fair, we are usually a bit more careful when choosing what to watch. An endless stream of inconceivably dumb, ridiculously implausible nonsense and not in a good way - just genuinely wall to wall stupid and some of the worst scripting, dialogue and plot imaginable even by the low standards of its genre. Hell, even the bombast was tarnished by some hopeless CGI.

 

I have no idea why we didn't just turn it off after fifteen minutes.

 

0/5.

The first one is a good b-movie, knows it's totally ridiculous and plays up to it, especially the ludicrously OTT takeover of the White House. The sequels were a mess, especially Angel Has Fallen which was dire.

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Southland Tales

 

Bizzare load of shite. I knew I shouldn't have bothered after seeing that Justin Timberlake and The Rock were in it, but I was seduced by it being on Mubi as 'perfect failure' and having a positive review. Also, quite an interesting concept. It's the second film by Richard Kelly, director of Donnie darko (his first film). Apparently it's now reached cult status acording to the Mubi 'take', though I suspect it can't be a fraction of the cult status Donnie Darko has. I found it to be a confusing mess. Maybe if I had finished it, it would have wrapped up and revealed itself. I had to switch it off though when Justin Timberlake started a weird music video scene where he lip syncs to The Killers All These Things I have Done. I just thought, what the hell am I doing wasting my time persevering with this shite. The JT video is hidden below.

 

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Arlington Road (1999)

 

The grieving husband (Jeff Bridges) of an FBI agent killed during a botched counter-terrorism operation suspects his neighbour (Tim Robbins) of being a domestic terrorist when new shit comes to light.

 

It stumbles headlong into "extreme" 90s cliché out of the gate- generic, pounding action music (why would you waste Angelo Badalamenti like this?), jump cuts and silly camera angles, the opening credits look like a bad music video... yet it starts to come together. The cast are never really believable- the dialogue is ridiculously on the nose sometimes and it does a poor job of building suspense. But the ending...

 

Spoiler

Robbins is at the heart of a unit of domestic terrorists and tricks Bridges into delivering a car bomb to FBI headquarters. Bridges doesn't realise this until it's too late- the bomb goes off, killing Bridges, an FBI agent and scores of security guards, while Robbins not only walks away free but also manages to pin another major terrorist incident on him. Bridges' orphaned son goes to live with other family and Robbins' unit moves to conduct operations elsewhere.

 

Fantastical, but bold to end the film on such a downer and it reminded me of all of the times you've heard about a major studio film having endings like this changed after test screenings or executive interference. It made me like the film a lot more than I was expecting to, given the shortcomings elsewhere.

 

3/5.

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Last Black Man in San Francisco
(2019)
Dir. Joe Talbot

 

Wonderfully dreamy and gentle allegory about gentrification and the ones who are left behind. A young and poor black man and his wannabe playwright friend squat in the house built by his Grandfather in 1946.

The house is a metaphor for the city, the new gentrified neighbours and the sketchy, maybe inaccurate history of the house reflecting the shaky sense of ownership of a place that people of all demographics feel (how can anyone ever claim to belong to stolen land more than anyone else?).

It feels very much like a West Coast 'Do the right thing'. Sumptuously shot and delicately performed.

In one lovely scene (which doubles as a Ghost World easter egg), a lady on a bus proclaims "I fucking hate San Francisco".

To which our man replies.

"But do you love it? You can't hate San Francisco unless you love it".

I really loved it.

 

8/10

 

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6 minutes ago, DeciderVT said:

Arlington Road (1999)

 

The grieving husband (Jeff Bridges) of an FBI agent killed during a botched counter-terrorism operation suspects his neighbour (Tim Robbins) of being a domestic terrorist when new shit comes to light.

 

It stumbles headlong into "extreme" 90s cliché out of the gate- generic, pounding action music (why would you waste Angelo Badalamenti like this?), jump cuts and silly camera angles, the opening credits look like a bad music video... yet it starts to come together. The cast are never really believable- the dialogue is ridiculously on the nose sometimes and it does a poor job of building suspense. But the ending...

 

  Hide contents

Robbins is at the heart of a unit of domestic terrorists and tricks Bridges into delivering a car bomb to FBI headquarters. Bridges doesn't realise this until it's too late- the bomb goes off, killing Bridges, an FBI agent and scores of security guards, while Robbins not only walks away free but also manages to pin another major terrorist incident on him. Bridges' orphaned son goes to live with other family and Robbins' unit moves to conduct operations elsewhere.

 

Fantastical, but bold to end the film on such a downer and it reminded me of all of the times you've heard about a major studio film having endings like this changed after test screenings or executive interference. It made me like the film a lot more than I was expecting to, given the shortcomings elsewhere.

 

3/5.


Yeah the whole film only really exists to service that fantastic ending. A film from a time when a film existed to tell a fully encapsulated story, isolated from audience tests and franchise potential. 

Oh how I miss those days.

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Bad Boys for Life (2020)

 

Not as good as the first, way better than the second, but if you enjoy Bad Boys then you'll enjoy this. It's really just more of the same but thankfully without Michael Bay directing (and based on Six Underground that was a very good decision). 

 

Lots of ott set pieces, slow mo, decent gun fights, fast vehicles and some good comedy. It was fun, I enjoyed it.

 

Bad Boys 3/5.

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Hobbs and Shaw

 

It's was a ridiculous film but had a tongue in cheek aspect to it that made it somewhat endearing.  One set piece to long however and the last set piece felt out of place to the point of being detrimental to the film.

 

3/5 if it stopped before Samoa.  2/5 after it.

 

Guns Akimbo

 

I think someone had said it had a similar tone to crank which I kind of agree with.  It was a decent way to pass 80 or so mins and I think something like Hobbs and Shaw could learn from this.  If your going to be ridiculous and a bit fun you need to know when to cut it.

 

3/5

 

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Villain (1971)

Richard Burton plays a Kray-style gang boss who likes to take his mum down to Brighton on a Sunday but also likes to severely hurt anyone who crosses him. The drama here largely focusses on the fallout from a botched armed robbery on a factory payroll, with police closing in and the money missing things get serious. Quality screenplay by Dick Clement and Ian Le Frenais adapted from a treatment itself based on a novel - a bit confusing but thankfully the results are solid. The grim and grimy tone lightened by dryly comic, memorable dialogue. Tons of well-known names in this including Ian McShane (whose dialogue appeared to be 99% dubbed by someone else), Nigel Davenport, Donald Sinden and Joss Ackland. Generally good performances from the main cast. The film acts as a good record of normal London for the time, with all the cars, fashions, advertising, shops etc thanks to plenty of location filming. Mention has to be made too of the excellent soundtrack. It's a shame this film gets forgotten against Get Carter, but this a tough, slightly off-beat crime drama that is worth the bother.

 

4/5

 

The music and atmosphere on this intro should sell it:

 

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Coffee and Kareem (2020 Netflix)

 

Because somebody had to.

 

Actually not quite as dire as I imagined it would be, but so filled with bad language...I can't believe I have to mention this as it makes me sound like a prude, but every f***ing line lol. I can see that they were trying for a sort of 80's/90's style buddy-up thing, but because they don't write the characters to any great degree it's hard to care about proceedings. It just felt like they couldn't wait to rush into the sillier stuff and the action scenes to make up for it. There are some funny lines here and there and the "gangsters" such as they are steal the show for me. We did indeed laugh on occasion, and that's rule number one for a comedy - make me laugh. I also appreciate that they keep these things around the 90 minute mark. This matters imho.

 

I'm feeling generous, so a 2.5 out of 5. On a bad day though, I could easily have seen myself giving it a 2 or even a 1. But the gangsters are worth an extra 1.5 points.

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Honey We Shrunk Ourselves (1997)

After shrinking his kids and blowing up his baby Wayne Szalinski accidentally shrinks himself, his wife, brother and sister-in-law this time. Theres not much to say with this really, it doesn't have any of the charm that the 1st film has and the character of Diane is so far removed from the woman she was in the other 2 films, she becomes quite unbearable. Not even Moranis' comedy genius can save this. There is one good part about boys not forcing themselves on girls and how they should wait for consent that works very well but other than that it's very forgettable.

1/5

 

Spies in Disguise (2019)

When I saw the trailer for this originally I didn't think it looked very good, just a random CGI kids film thrown out there for the holidays. But I heard good things from some friends so watched it today with the kids and really enjoyed it. It obviously riffs on all the typical Bond/MI tropes but in a fun way that works well for kids. Theres a nice message in there for kids about solving things non violently and theres a lot of laughs in it too, especially involving the pigeons.

4/5

 

Doctor Dolittle (1998)

With Disney+ comes the ability to watch a lot of kids films from when my wife and I were young. I didn't think it was all that great when I was younger but my wife thought our kids would enjoy it. They ended up playing with toys before it finished which kind of shows they thought the same as me. It's not great.

2/5

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Love Wedding Repeat (2020)

 

The basis of this film is about how the course of love can be changed due to the tiniest of things. It then shows how those various scenarios could be played out. Its bascially Sliding Doors but set at a wedding. Theres a few laughs but really it's a lot of horrible people you dont really get to know very well doing comedy set ups for an hour and 40 mins. Theres even a few serious things in there that get played for cheap laughs. It's not very good.

 

(a generous) 2/5 

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On 12/04/2020 at 22:19, Vimster said:

The first one is a good b-movie, knows it's totally ridiculous and plays up to it, especially the ludicrously OTT takeover of the White House. The sequels were a mess, especially Angel Has Fallen which was dire.

 

Aah, we chose the wrong one but that's Amazon pushing it at us.

 

Wasn't expecting, and didn't want, anything challenging but London Has Fallen failed to delivery anything other than anger at how bad it was. If the completed  shooting script took more than half a day to generate then I would be amazed., if it took longer than that then the writer should never be employed again. Thinking back, it was  also incredibly, stupidly, xenophobic if not out and out racist.

 

A staggeringly bad film.

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Come To Daddy

 

We were supposed to see this at Home last year but had a row so didn't go. It came up in the Amazon feed the other night so we finally got round to watching it.

 

Should have left it at losing our ticket costs for the Home showing really as Come To Daddy is one boring film and one that is an awful long way from  the hype and advertising suggestion of  a bloody horror comedy. We gave it the benefit of the doubt for the first thirty minutes or so as we know Elijah Wood is a proper genre fan and, as such, hoped that he would deliver a great payback following the slow, not especially interesting, character intro. Sadly, he didn't - this is a film that went nowhere and failed to deliver on any level - it was neither funny nor horrific.

 

1/5 with the one awarded for an unexpected Michael Heseltine reference.

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Carry on Behind.  
 

Seems far lower profile than most of them - with a few of the regulars missing - no Sid James!!!!  - but thoroughly enjoyed it. Kenneth Williams and Elke Sommer work brilliantly together.  
 

So yeah I’d give it one ooer, but I’m actually going for 3.5/5. 
 

Carry on Doctor. 
 

Jim Dale present and correct so a lighthearted 4/5.

Carry on Dick. 
 

Has the whole cast thrown at it but doesn't work at all really. 
 

1.5/5. 
 

Annie. 
 

Oh how I hate musicals and how I have to admit this is a cracking watch. 
Kids love it, wife loves it, I er......can’t deny it appeal. 
 

4.5/5. 


 

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On 13/04/2020 at 23:07, Stigweard said:

Love Wedding Repeat (2020)

 

The basis of this film is about how the course of love can be changed due to the tiniest of things. It then shows how those various scenarios could be played out. Its bascially Sliding Doors but set at a wedding. Theres a few laughs but really it's a lot of horrible people you dont really get to know very well doing comedy set ups for an hour and 40 mins. Theres even a few serious things in there that get played for cheap laughs. It's not very good.

 

(a generous) 2/5 

 

I actually rather liked this, but I can understand why you've said this.  The best thing in this is the guy who played Sidekick Simon.  Anyway, I quite enjoyed it but I was about 4 glasses of wine down when we put it on.  It made us laugh.

 

3.5/5

 

Chef

 

This is just a lovely, lovely film written, directed by and starring Jon Favreau.  I don't advise watching this if you're even the slightest bit hungry as some of the food they cook is practically pornographic.  I loved this.

 

4/5

 

The Good Dinosaur

 

Watched this with the kids on Easter Sunday on Disney + and it's a gorgeous looking film, albeit one with very little originality underneath it all.  I think a family move with snacks is the best way to enjoy this.  A nice 90 minutes but certainly not Pixar's best IMO.

 

3/5

 

Monsters University

 

And this was yesterday's movie - we still had snacks and easter eggs left.  Loved this - not quite reaching the heights of the original but a neat idea nonetheless.  A bonus mark for Helen Mirren.

 

4/5

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The Platform (2019) Netflix

 

Amazing. Really dark social commentary I believe from Spain. A bloke volunteers to go into a kind of vertical prison under the promise he walks out with a degree at the end of it. Can take one item in, and chooses a book. Without spoiling too much he learns there are many levels to this prison, and a table filled with food slowly progresses through from level 0 down to...well, I won't spoil that! Suffice to say there's less on it by the time it gets to the bottom. The inmates are moved around randomly each month and can find themselves on any level with a different approach to survival needed, which can colour just who you are in this game...

 

Tense, scary, exciting...probably not the ideal film to watch if you questioning society around you at this moment, but we loved it.

 

4.5/5

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Visitor Q - 2.5/5

 

I watched this because it was on Mubi, and had totally forgotten I’d already seen it on C4 years ago.

 

It was shocking cinema at the time, and it’s hard to know if it still is...but while I understand what it’s doing and still get a few yuks out of the black humour, I just didn’t find it very entertaining.

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Watched Bacurau on Mubi cos heard it was quite John Carpenter. It was good. I lost interest a little when the reason behind all the weirdness was revealed - I found the place Dornelles and Filho created proper interesting off the bat and the characters that come in in the second half of the film are less interesting. But it's got that Carpenter roughness, leanness and pulp. 4/5.

 

Currently chewing (sic) through Eat the Rich and Heart of Glass. Will report back.

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Tarzan, the Ape Man (1981)

 

Not even Bo Derek getting her kit off can save this. The first two novels are so cram packed with action and adventure, it makes your head spin. And somehow, with all that amazing source material on tap, they made the most boring Tarzan movie ever. A scene where Tarzan fights a giant snake is possibly the worst piece of action directing I've ever seen: it's made entirely of badly edited cross-fades that seem to go on for about ten minutes.

 

As the credits roll over the final scene, the movie appears to suggest that a threesome with Tarzan, Jane, and an orangutan might be on the cards. And then the movie ends.

 

I was so glad this movie ended. I was so sad that I ever started it.

 

1 out of 5

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So, there is a "movie" called ...Corona Zombies! it is some utter top tier trash built on some other trash! its amazing in its trashyness lol

Its terrible, utterly terrible...get drunk, then watch it  :D

 

MV5BZGFjNWZjMjQtMmNiZC00NWQyLWExZTItMzc2

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