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Rate the last film you watched out of 5

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Going in style

 

First rate light viewing. A great cast (including one of my old faves, Matt Dillon) and a solid story in this OAP heist movie. 

 

4/5 if you are over 45

2/5 otherwise 

 

Enemy Mine

 

Much better than I remember it being. I remember it being much more amateur and having much more dodgy space battles. But this was excellent apart from a poor opening 10 minutes. 2 amazing performances from the leads. 

 

4/5

 

The neverending story

 

Not bad, but not great either. In tone it reminded me of The Princess Bride which is another film I think is just okay. Still, I did enjoy a lot of it but it did look very 80s fantasy and there is a reason I haven't seen it in 30 years

 

2.5/5

 

Earth to echo

 

This excellent film totally failed to find an audience (not helped by another terrible trailer). Its really worth checking out and is equally derivative and inventive. The young cast are uniformly brilliant and Echo is cute as heck.  

 

4/5

 

Kin

 

Second Dennis Quaid movie of the week. This is a very confused film, does it want to be a Sci fi movie or a road movie? It also ends just as it gets really interesting and is saved by the young lead and an excellent turn from Franco. I did enjoy it a lot, but it really needs a sequel to finish the story 

 

3.5/5

 

The big easy

 

My third Quaid movie is the weakest of the 3. It didn't gel well at all and there were a good 3 movies worth of plots going on. It also stars the real Jim Garrison (of JFK fame) as the judge. I've already forgotten 2/3rds of the movie and I only watched it 2 days ago

 

1.5/5

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I really enjoyed Ford Vs Ferrari, but I did chuckle throughout at anyone's attempts to paint Miles as a problem character. He seemed like a great father and husband, a loyal friend, a dedicated, hard worker and a tremendous talent behind the wheel. Josh Lucas's character was borderline snarling comic villain in his attempts to discredit him.

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Ready Or Not - 2.5/5

 

Massively average. Completely watchable, but utterly forgettable. Nice to see Andie MacDowell in something again. 

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The Dark Knight

 

Ledger just steals every scene he's in as Joker. Incredible cinematography and score really make this a fantastic film.

 

5 flying rodents / 5

 

The Dark Knight Rises

 

Anne Hathaway as Catwoman? SOLD!!

 

5 unintelligible words from Bane / 5

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VFW (2019)

Take some seasoned exploitation actors including William Sadler and Fred Williamson, stick them in a bar in a nightmare part of town full of 80s throwback street punks, then introduce the catalyst that sets said punks against said bar and you get one of the best low-budget action/horror flicks of the last decade. Yes it owes a massive debt to Assault On Precinct 13, and the John Carpenter influence extends to the immense synth soundtrack, here it all comes together so thrillingly. Tons of excellent practical gore and blood, satisfying, gleeful old-school viscera. There's a bit of inter-generational cobblers and mentions of millennials but it doesn't spoil the fun. And it is fun, it'll leave a smile on your face, not least because it shows this sort of film-making is not dead. 

 

4.5/5

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Nice. Love a good practical blood pack.

 

Parasite

Really gets into your head afterwards with plenty to think about and go back to. Definitely worthy of a cold viewing.

 

5 spoilers/5

 

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Annabelle: Creation (2017)

 

Dumb fucks in horror movie ahoy! "Ooh what's behind this creepy door that the creepy dude who lives here told us never to go into?" FFS, why are you doing that? You deserve death TBQH.

 

Revolting doll and standard jump potential add to the checklist of required content.

 

Good fun, a bit silly, wish they'd throw that fucking creepy doll into a fire.

 

3/5

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14 hours ago, Vimster said:

VFW (2019)

Take some seasoned exploitation actors including William Sadler and Fred Williamson, stick them in a bar in a nightmare part of town full of 80s throwback street punks, then introduce the catalyst that sets said punks against said bar and you get one of the best low-budget action/horror flicks of the last decade. Yes it owes a massive debt to Assault On Precinct 13, and the John Carpenter influence extends to the immense synth soundtrack, here it all comes together so thrillingly. Tons of excellent practical gore and blood, satisfying, gleeful old-school viscera. There's a bit of inter-generational cobblers and mentions of millennials but it doesn't spoil the fun. And it is fun, it'll leave a smile on your face, not least because it shows this sort of film-making it snot dead. 

 

4.5/5


This sounds great! Hopefully the Prince Charles will be screening it soon, looks like a perfect fit in terms of venue, likely crowd and film.

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Dolittle 

 

3/5

 

Fast-paced and enjoyable, apart from Robert Downey Jr's atrocious Welsh accent. Seemed to me lots of his lines were dubbed over or re-recorded, very distracting. 

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I've spoilered this as I mention a couple of plot points, but the essence is this is rubbish made by people who either hadn't watched the original two films or who never really grasped what made them great.

 

Terminator Dark Fate (2019)

Spoiler

The Terminator was a stark, efficient pitch-perfect genre thriller. Terminator 2 Judgement Day managed to expand on the original, added the human factor without watering down the essence of the story. And whilst this tries to reign in the added cobblers of the last three films by being something of a continuation of the second, it still fails to stay true to the original source material spectacularly. Everything from Arnie's compassionate family-terminator to the new model standing there giving a speech to Arnie and his potential victim just smacks of how little the film-makers understand what made the original two films great. In fact it feels like a film made by people who'd not seen the first two but were working from a second-hand description. The action just gets silly, it's pure spectacle with set-piece after convenient set-piece. It's just not a cohesive story. In fact I was bored by the end. Bored. By a Terminator film. This franchise desperately needs to be terminated.

2/5

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Yesterday

 

Man has accident at exact moment world forgets about The Beatles. Plus it's a romance. I actually really enjoyed this. Quite light hearted viewing which just about keeps on the right side of saccharine. The two leads are brilliant in this and Himesh Patel's versions of popular Beatles do sound good. 

 

The tone of the film reminded me very much of Run Fat Boy Run.  Slightly bittersweet but utterly endearing. Helps if you are a Beatles fan obviously (although it didn't hamper my wife's enjoyment who is definitely not a Beatles fan despite having a Beatles tribute band at our wedding)

 

4/5

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Parasite - As has already been said numerous times, this was utterly fantastic. I'm not saying anything else for those who haven't seen it yet. 5/5

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6 Underground

 

Bit of an odd one, this. Objectively, I know it was shite, but it was still enjoyable. The action sequences, which made up 90% of the film were actually really good, though right from the get go there's a massive innocent bystander body count. There's some really funny bits and laugh out loud one liners. But anytime it tried to get serious it was just shit and there was a lot that felt really out of place in a fairly throwaway action film - civilians bring gassed and kids bring orphaned. There was a good amount of gore thrown in for no good reason as well.

 

It's odd, I liked it, but I think it's a 2/5 film. 

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1 minute ago, ScouserInExile said:

6 Underground

 

Bit of an odd one, this. Objectively, I know it was shite, but it was still enjoyable. The action sequences, which made up 90% of the film were actually really good, though right from the get go there's a massive innocent bystander body count. There's some really funny bits and laugh out loud one liners. But anytime it tried to get serious it was just shit and there was a lot that felt really out of place in a fairly throwaway action film - civilians bring gassed and kids bring orphaned. There was a good amount of gore thrown in for no good reason as well.

 

It's odd, I liked it, but I think it's a 2/5 film. 

I know what you mean. I saw this recently too but came away thinking I'd wasted my time. Some really pointless things in it which were only there to "look good". 

 

Spoiler

Like the Parkour guy being on top of the church (?) Roof in the first car chase.  There was no reason for him to be there other than to show off his skillz. 

 

The random romancing was fairly pointless too other than to show off some attractive flesh. 

I think Ryan Reynolds has a problem similar to Tom Cruise - It isn't Ethan Hawk in MI films it's Tom Cruise. I see Reynolds in the same way in his films. 

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Rambo : Last Blood

 

Rambo has settled down in a border town ranch raising horses with his sister and niece. Niece goes to Mexico looking to confront the father who left many years before. She doesn't return. 

I loved the previous film for it's return to 18 cert violence.  This is surprisingly close in it's depiction of how to kill a bunch of loathsome bad guys in the most violent version of Home Alone ever. Taken as the final film in the series it's throwaway rubbish. Taken as how can we make Rambo angrier than he's ever been and give him 30 minutes of solid revenge murders in the most graphic sense it does it's job well. Running time of 1hour 25 minutes where the final 10 minutes are a montage of clips from previous movies it's the perfect length for what it is.

 

4/5 Expected to be underwhelmed but really enjoyed it and was very happily surprised by that.

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Crash 1996 Cronenberg  - There have been few films that made me feel gross after watching this and Crash is one of them. 3/5

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Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom

 

Absolute bobbins!! Didn't know whether it wanted to be an out-and-out action blockbuster or a more reserved Gothic horror. So both are crammed in.

 

And d'ya know what? I rather enjoyed it.

 

3.5 pairs of Bryce Dallas Howard's sensible shoes / 5

 

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Just Mercy

 

Pretty anger enduring and sad true story about wrongly charged Black men on death row and the racist fuckwits of Alabama. 

 

Good film, doesn't bring much new to the plate and felt like I have seen it before but decent film overall.

 

Solid performances from Jamie Foxx and Michael B Jordan.

 

3/5

 

 

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Color Out Of Space 2019

 

Amateur Alpaca farmer gets zapped by alien radiation with spectacular results.

 

Excellent but uneven 80's throwback with an extra dollop of Cage madness.

 

4/5

 

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Weathering with You

 

Very pretty, also emotionally overwrought. But then it is an anime coming-of-age film so I'm not sure what else I was expecting.

 

3/5

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The call of the Wild

 

A great yarn with a few issues (mainly CGI related). I really go into Buck's tale and Ford is excellent. It moves at a great pace and there isn't any fat on it at all.  When Disney make the inevitable live action remake of Pochahantas they don't need to look further than  Cara Gee for the lead. 

 

4/5.  ( the wife hated it though and rated it 0/5!!)

 

Boyhood

 

 A bit late to the party with this one. I thought it started well, but it had a big problem once the lead actor hit puberty and somehow forgot how to act. Hawke comfortably out acted every else by a staggering amount and should have been the one to nab the Oscar. Still, a good film for the most part and apart from A Scanner Darkly the only Linklater I've seen. 

 

3.5/5

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Uncut Gems (2019)

 

As mentioned, this is quite a ride. Sandler's performance is probably the best I've ever seen from him. Hopefully this will see him cast in this sort of role again, and not as the reprehensible twat he normally plays.

 

4/5

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On 23/02/2020 at 16:13, yakumo said:

Crash 1996 Cronenberg  - There have been few films that made me feel gross after watching this and Crash is one of them. 3/5

This is one of a select bunch of films that I've paid to see (I rented it on VHS, iirc) and didn't watch all the way through. I think there's probably only this and Freddie Got Fingered. 

 

Always tempted to give it another go. Crash, that is, not Freddie Got Fingered. That was truly awful.

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Both of these are first-time viewings for me...

 

Godzilla King of Monsters

 

Perfectly serviceable monster movie with a simple plot and flashy effects. One third-act reveal was a bit clichéd but the scale of the carnage was fun.

 

3/5

 

Batman Begins

 

Fun superhero vigilante revenge stuff that has enough spectacle to avoid being too dour and joyless. If anything it's maybe a bit too absurd at times but then it is a superhero movie. ;) 

 

4/5

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8 minutes ago, ScouserInExile said:

This is one of a select bunch of films that I've paid to see (I rented it on VHS, iirc) and didn't watch all the way through. I think there's probably only this and Freddie Got Fingered. 

 

Always tempted to give it another go. Crash, that is, not Freddie Got Fingered. That was truly awful.

 

I personally wouldn't recommend it personally, I'm just watching it as I'm going through his back catalogue. Just felt uncomfortable and nihilistic in nature that I didn't take to despite being the hallmarks of everything he loves and done.

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First Blood 

 

This is one of the films I will watch on TV every single time I see it on. And it's always enjoyable. Just a really good film. All he wanted was something to eat ffs. 

 

5/5

 

Clarifying note: I actually watched it on now tv cinema pass this time. 

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La Haine

 

It must be a good 22-23 years since I last watched this. Sadly it hasn't aged a day, if anything it is more relatable now than it was in 1995.

 

I've been down a funny road with this film - I loved it on release, saw it at the Glasgow Film Theatre - introduced it to a friend who loathed it instantly because the main characters reminded him of neds that had assaulted him in the past - his reaction changed my perception a fair bit and I didn't watch it again.

 

Watched it again last night, this time aware of the thuggish personalities but also the dichotomy of the whole thing (with the police brutality) - had completely forgotten how it ends.

 

I don't think I'd ever noticed before how the subtitles butcher the dialogue - changing smurfs to Donald Duck and asterix/obelisk to snoopy/Charlie brown. I think I'm gonna edit the srt file for those lines.

 

5/5 shits in a nice comfortable toilet (not the Siberian steppes)

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