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Rate the last film you watched out of 5


Raoull duke
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Last Looks (aka Waldo) - 3/5 (screener)

 

Putting this out there: I don't mind that there Charlie Hunnam. He's no Brando, despite his amazing accent in Green Street, but he does have buckets of charm, which he deploys well in this light-hearted murder mystery, also starring the always watchable Morena Baccarin, Clancy Brown and Rupert Friend. Mel Gibson also appears, which I do appreciate might affect some viewers enjoyment. It's an odd role too, because he plays an eccentric British actor, of which Hollywood is not exactly short on, so quite why they cast Gibson is beyond me. But if you can get past him, and his total screen time is only about 10% of the film, there's an enjoyable crime caper to be had once it pops up on whichever streaming platform acquire it to put their logo on.

 

(#520)

 

Tangent, but not sure if Just Watch is widely known around these parts? It's a website that lists all the services a film is available on in your region. I use it for work/personal and is quite handy for tracking down titles.

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Meeeeeeh, watching Hustle but getting bored af. Hilarious in places but I'm like 90 minutes in and it's getting tepid. Been decent up until now but 2/5 because it ain't got me locked in.

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Crawlspace - 2/5 (screener)

 

Henry Thomas IS trapped in a space with enough room to crawl. For a bit. But he can’t phone home!

 

Rubbish.

 

Sonic the Hedgehog 2 - 3/5 (screener)

 

Jim Carrey sells Robotnik hard, which tips this into being a decent romp. It’s runtime is a little over-egged (arf!) but never got dull.

 

Thor: Love and Thunder - 3/5 (cinema)

 

Popped along to Picturehouse Central after work with minimal expectations based on the lukewarm reviews. Yet enjoyed it much more than expected, even if the moodier moments of drama are slightly undone by the possibility of a joke every two seconds. But after the shrug of a movie that was Black Widow and the dour Eternals, this was a lighthearted tonic. There have probably been over MCU movies recently but I’ve forgotten them.

 

(#522-524 - bit off the pace for 1,000 films in a year but will keep plugging away)

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Saw - This has aged really horribly. Horrible acting, cheap looking, not scary or thrilling. A couple of cool twists that still hit well, but they don’t save it. 2/5

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Requiem for a Dream - 2/5 (Prime)

 

Been on my watchlist for a while but now I’ve seen it feel very underwhelmed, considering how lauded it is. Felt like watching a Harper’s Bazaar fashion shoot with a drug theme had come to life. There are some positives, with Ellen Burstyn’s performance probably the strongest, but nothing in it felt particularly original. Maybe today just wasn’t the day for me to see what plenty of others have in the film.
 

For gritty drama, give me something akin to I, Daniel Blake. Actually, Trainspotting is far more harrowing than Requiem, yet still balances out its addiction hideousness with moments of gallows humour that make it infinitely more rewatchable. And it doesn’t have Lux Aeterna smashed in your ears every five minutes.

 

Shootfighter: Fight to the Death - 2/5 (Prime)

 

An early 90s curiosity that reunites William Zabka and Martin Kove long before Cobra Kai’s rebooted them onto our screens.

 

It’s a low rent Bloodsport, with some half-decent fight scenes. One for martial arts movie enthusiasts only.

 

(#527-528)

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Inspired by the thread about the upcoming series

 

National Treasure - 3/5

A solid, charming 2000s adventure film. And I'd completely forgotten Sean Bean was in it, which was a bonus!

 

National Treasure : Book of Secrets - 1/5

Switched it off halfway through. Everybody's playing a caricature of their roles from the first film, the action is a loud angry mess, and this is clearly around the time Cage became self-aware of (or encouraged to play up) his previously occasional eccentricity.

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The Spectacular Now
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1714206/

 

A hard-partying high school senior's philosophy on life changes when he meets the not-so-typical "nice girl."

 

This was a really nice coming-of-age film set in a small American town. A good adult cast (Bob Odenkirk, Kyle Chandler) and a great 'teenagers' cast (Miles Teller, Shailene Woodley, Bree Larson) all put in great shifts. 

 

This does nothing new and plays out exactly as you think it will (mismatched couple get together, have some good times but then some bad times and eventually split. Will they resolve their issues before high school ends???). But it looks great, the cast are excellent and it's in and out in 90 minutes. Good stuff.

 

4/5

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The Gray Man

 

Need to kill 2 hours without thinking? then this nonsensical film should be on your list

 

I bet the makers are gutted the title "Everything Everywhere All at Once" was already taken. EDIT D'oh I see they are the makers of that film! Haha makes sense now. This film has no connecting dots whatsoever it's almost robotic in going from A-B to C without any context, and performs feats of human impossibility. 

 

2/5

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In The Loop (2009)

Going to be totally honest here, I fell asleep towards the end of this because it felt like one of those work meetings called by senior managers where you don't really feel that relevant but you assume it must be important. Mind you Peter Capaldi is stellar in this, given some of the best insults ever committed to film.

 

3/5

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The Lighthouse (2019) - Blu-Ray

 

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This was pretty damn magnificent, I thought, in every respect: the photography, the music, the writing, the sound effects, the performances, the acting. Haunting, literary and funny. And a surprising amount of wanking, too.

 

A must see.

 

5/5

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Rise Of The Footsoldier: Origins (2021)

Somehow they manage to wring a few more drops of juice from the Rettendon murders, this time filling in a bit more detail in the early days, concentrating on Tony Tucker who is played more serious in this as opposed to the comedy character in the previous film. You know the drill by now: birds, pills, shooters, people getting punched in the face for being a tasty cunt, in fact they use the word "cunt" 68 times in this. Very little effort to stick to the period. This is probably the best role Vinnie Jones has had in years, although let's face it this wasn't much of a stretch. If you enjoyed the previous four films there's no reason you'll not like this, it's very on formula, you caaaaahnt!

 

3/5

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Dr Strange in the Multiverse of Madness (2022)

 

I loved the first film, and really looked forward to this one - hoping it would correct the somewhat stupid Dr Strange that appeared in the Spider-Man film.. damn was I disappointed.
 

There are a lot of fights (ridiculous fights) and special effects with no tangible story or character building - it felt like a parody of Dr Strange created by a second rate cast and terrible writer. I watched it to the end with my other half, both of us utterly amazed by just how bad it was and wondering if something, anything might happen to rescue it. Nothing did.

 

I fear for the MCU, it feels like a steepening downward slope - the quality of the first and second waves feels like a distant memory. Please don’t ruin GotG3, please.

 

1/5, awful.

 

 

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Daydream Nation

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt1581835/

 

A city girl who moves to a small town and becomes entangled in a love triangle between her high school teacher and a stoner classmate.

 

Very strange Canadian teen drama which can't really settle on what it wants to be. One minute it's trying for Euphoria-type excess, full of sex and drugs, the next it's a weirdly pious romance. Kat Dennings is by a distance the best thing about it. And it has 'Your Ex-Lover is Dead' by Stars on the soundtrack so it gets points for that but the whole thing is a mess. 

 

I looked on IMDB and it's the directors only feature to date. I wouldn't hold my breath for another.

 

2/5

 

 

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War On Everyone (Amazon, not free)

 

After having watched the amazing The Guard again since it's now available on Netflix (and thats a solid 5/5 from me for all it's coincidences and daftness but absolutely gorgeous look and feel) I tracked down what director John Michael McDonagh (Brother of In Bruges director Martin McDonagh, small world!) did next and it was this.

 

Another but very different buddy thing with Michael Peña and Alexander Skarsgård as corrupt policemen on the trail of evil people doing horrible stuff. Was a bit disjointed and wonky compared to The Guard but it won me over with its supreme idiocy and mixed cast of loveable and hateful misfits.

 

Its £1.99 to rent or £2.99 to buy so I bought it and I know I'm gonna watch it again sometime soon. Very much enjoyed this 

 

4/5

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Dual (2022)

Very, very dry, dark comedy SF about a dying woman who agrees to have a clone made but no longer needs her. The tone is almost robotic by design, and I'm sure that will put a lot of people off, but it clicked with me early on. Some great ideas and the dry humour was right up my street. If you pay close attention the ending won't surprise you as much but it's no less satisfying as it is surprisingly engaging.

 

3.5/5

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Elvis -4/5

 

Watched this last night in a cinema in Oban with about 10 seats. Was great. Finding out it's the lead actors first role is mind blowing. He is absolutely phenomenal and must be in with a best actor Oscar nod. 

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8 hours ago, Ry said:

Elvis -4/5

 

Watched this last night in a cinema in Oban with about 10 seats. Was great. Finding out it's the lead actors first role is mind blowing. He is absolutely phenomenal and must be in with a best actor Oscar nod. 

 

You mean first leading role? He's been in loads of stuff before. But I agree, he was amazing in this and I think he will get a nomination.

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2 hours ago, Stigweard said:

 

You mean first leading role? He's been in loads of stuff before. But I agree, he was amazing in this and I think he will get a nomination.

 

Ah right, i thought I had read it was his first acting gig. 

 

 

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The Grey Man - 3/5

 

Went in expecting utter shite and was surprised. Really good old fashioned action film. Gosling being cool as hell and Evans being great as a slimey villain again. Some cool set pieces and action. Does nothing new but solid stuff.  Oh and Ana De Armas. She elevates everything. Including me. Again, solid stuff. 

 

Felt like I was watching a big budget shoot em up game at times. Even had the turret sections. 

 

Yeah, decent action film. 

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Jurassic World Domination

 

Absolute dogshit. Badly scripted and acted, the actors always look immaculate to the point of resembling wax mannequins, and the constant nostalgia bombs and recycled greatest hits felt like a dearth of ideas. None of it makes a fucking lick of sense, it's boring and it's barely even worth watching for the dinosaurs.

 

Has the potential to be a future drinking game on account of how shit it is.

 

1/5

 

Thor: Love and Thunder

 

Certainly disjointed, but it feels like the only qualification for throwing something up on screen was 'is it fun?'. And I'm entirely ok with that. Not much to it if you didn't find those bits fun, but fortunately I did. Confused by the Russell Crowe accent, obviously.

 

3/5

 

The Black Phone

 

I had high hopes for this, but it's just a bit meh. It never feels horrifying, and lives more in the space of a Goosebumps-grade adventure. There are one or two nice shots, and the Tom Savini masks are creative, but there was little tension and it was fully predictable. Also I didn't want any of the kids to survive. The backstory felt underdeveloped, which is always a risk with a short story adaptation, but it's also easily the least interesting Joe Hill thing I've encountered.

 

2.5/5

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47 Metres Down: Uncaged - 2/5 (iPlayer)

 

Aka Four Idiots Go Cavediving. At least it’s well made fluff, and even has a decent nod to Deep Blue Sea. But if you want a silly film about sharks, you might as well watch LL Cool J and his parrot Vs Brain Sharks or whatever they were.

 

Deep Blue Sea should get a wholly unnecessary reboot; that film was dumber than a box of rocks but more fun than going on a rollercoaster at sunset.

 

(#533)

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Thor Love and Thunder : Scorcese was always right/5

 

Soulless shit. Regurgitated gash. But hey...big man do same recycled marvel joke 8 times.... funny for plebs. Give me a billion dollars. 

 

4/5.

 

 

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The Witch (2016) - Blu-Ray

 

image.thumb.png.8a9f783a2ae97a38dc4581279873c26f.png

 

After really enjoying The Lighthouse a couple of nights ago (see above), I found this mildly disappointing. It's a good film, beautifully shot with some wonderful dialogue, and it kept me interested throughout its 90 minute runtime, but after having read how highly some people rate it, I found it never really stretched to the same heights for me, and I was left waiting for a killer moment that never quite came.

 

I think it would have been more successful if 

Spoiler

we had never seen the witch at all, and the cause of what was happening was ambiguous. Is it supernatural? Is it one of the family members fucking with the others? Or is it even all just hallucinatory, brought about by a combination of starvation and the ergot in the rotting corn everyone is eating? This would have made the bit at the very end,

Spoiler

when Thomasin communes with the devil and the other witches in the wood,

more impactful; it would have been more shocking to discover that, actually, supernatural shit was going on the entire time and wasn't just the family's zealotry imposing an imagined narrative upon coincidence. As we see the witch at start of the film, however, and she's made out to be an explicitly supernatural figure in what she does with the baby (and then, later, Caleb), the ambiguity is lost, which I felt was a big misstep.

 

3/5

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Whiplash (2014) -  Netflix

 

image.thumb.png.c4d1f610c840654a180b37fa4364a2a8.png

 

The wife and child were out today, so I had the rare opportunity of watching two films back-to-back. This is my second time watching this, and it was just as brilliant as the first. Obviously, Simmons' performance as the relentless music teacher is fantastic, but I thought the transformation that Miles Teller's character undergoes is just as worthy of praise. One of the best endings to a film I've seen in the last ten years, too. Absolutely electrifying - you can feel the tingles.

 

Superb.

 

5/5

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1 hour ago, Jamie John said:

Whiplash (2014) -  Netflix

 

image.thumb.png.c4d1f610c840654a180b37fa4364a2a8.png

 

The wife and child were out today, so I had the rare opportunity of watching two films back-to-back. This is my second time watching this, and it was just as brilliant as the first. Obviously, Simmons' performance as the relentless music teacher is fantastic, but I thought the transformation that Miles Teller's character undergoes is just as worthy of praise. One of the best endings to a film I've seen in the last ten years, too. Absolutely electrifying - you can feel the tingles.

 

Superb.

 

5/5

 

Not quite my score..

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