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Extinct by Dreamworks

 

On a Pacific island live creatures called Flummels. Never heard of them? That’s because they became extinct... except for two misfits, banished from the Flower Festival who end up time-travelling to modern Shanghai. Can they work out how to get back and save the species?

 

Pretty bland computer animated fare, with the donut-shaped creatures looking very odd. Some very funny moments and a great musical number, but this is very much below-average half-term filler.

 

2/5

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Snake Eyes : G.I. Joe Origins

 

I feel bad for the cast, because a) for the first time it was proper Asian representation across the board, and b) Storm Shadow wasn’t just a male model poser this time (plus the actor said he didn’t want to do a G.I. Joe. movie and I thought he succeeded in making more of the part) and c) this could have been a big break for many of them…

 

but it’s awful. The script writers must have been changed for every scene? We’re introduced to this gangster punk (Tommy) that’s like a small crew boss, who then introduces our hero to the bigger boss, who we are expected to think will do something bad to the hero. Except he flips expectations by revealing Tommy was a spy and trying to kill him.

 

OK fair enough so far, but in the aftermath of the escape it’s revealed that Tommy is actually a senior family member of that boss guy and had previously banished him from his clan. So he banished him, and then went to work for him? And they pretended they didn’t know each other? Durrr….

 

Spoiler

Then later on another member of the clan claims that it was actually her that banished him. Snake Eyes spends the whole movie spying on, stealing from and being mistrusted by the Arashikage clan, with his actions being directly responsible for Tommy’s downfall and the destruction of most of their castle grounds. Then at the end they bafflingly choose him as the Golden boy and kick Tommy out on his arse.


This is all putting aside the fact that Snake Eyes has always traditionally been a mute, disfigured mysterious bad-ass who doesn’t show his face cos it’s so effed up - not some wise-ass jerk that doesn’t even know who Cobra is.

 

(also he randomly gets introduced to an 18ish year old Scarlett that tells him about his dad that died 20yrs ago like they had been close colleagues.)

 

Oh, I forgot to rate it. 2/5? Still better than the last G.I. joe. movie I saw.

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Sartana's Here... Trade Your Pistol for a Coffin

 

The third Sartana movie and a different lead actor, but it doesn't take too long to get used to George Hilton in the role, as he's damn charasmatic. Rather than miss the actor from the first two movies, Gianni Garko (although Garko is great), I missed the red trim from Sartana's black cloak more. I know Garko returns for the last two. I hope the red trim returns too!

 

As for the story: gold, bandits, gun slinging, double crosses, triple crosses and quadruple crosses. Sartana kills some dudes by firing his pistol concealed in a loaf of bread and calls it his "sandwich gun".

 

4 out of 5

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Watch Out, We're Mad!

Terence Hill and Bud Spencer team up to get their Dune Buggy back from the local gangster, who has Donald Pleasance as his evil sidekick. Laurel and Hardy levels of slapstick.

4 slaps out of 5

 

Trinity Is Still My Name

See above, but swap the plot for a western and remove Donald Pleasance

4 slaps out of 5

 

Army Of Darkness

Groovy 5/5

 

The Rum Diary

Going through a Hunter S Thompson book binge just now, but this isn't a great film.

3/5 for Johnny Depp having fun with the character.

 

 

 

 

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2 hours ago, Mr Majestyk said:

The Rum Diary

Going through a Hunter S Thompson book binge just now, but this isn't a great film.

3/5 for Johnny Depp having fun with the character.

 

 

 

 


I love this book - I guess on that basis the film is best avoided? I must admit I didn’t know it had been filmed.

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48 minutes ago, ZOK said:


I love this book - I guess on that basis the film is best avoided? I must admit I didn’t know it had been filmed.

 

It's somewhat different from the book, characters combined and changes to the story. The film itself is a bit dull but Depp plays Kemp well, and the cast are pretty good given what they have to work with. I wouldn't avoid it, but keep your expectations to a minimum and just enjoy the ride. 

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Men in Black International.  

 

After really enjoying MIB3 I was disappointed by the dire reviews this got, and had given it a wide berth. 

 

I thought I'd give it a go when it popped up on Netflix, and because my expectation was so low, perhaps, thought it was alright. 

 

I certainly preferred it to the last couple of Marvel films I've seen and it's that same sort of thing. Looks really good, imo, reasonable story,  couple of jokes, outstays it's welcome a little / pacing is a bit off in places, but generally speaking it was OK as far as this sort of thing goes.

 

Not a ringing endorsement, 3/5.

 

Edit: lol, the highest score and most positive review the film got in the thread.

 

 

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Summer of Soul

 

Really interesting documentary about the Harlem Cultural festival of 1969, lazily referred to as Black Woodstock. It looks like it was an incredible time, but it also doesn't feel like we get to delve properly into anything: the politics, the music, the machinery of New York under Lindsay. 

 

I'd love to watch a more in-depth series, but in the absence of it this is well worth a watch for yet another historic Black American story that never reached the masses,

 

3.5/5

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Bad Day for The Cut

Netlix. 

An Irish farmer seeks revenge after his elderly mother is murdered. It's quite a tight story, believable cast and brutal. In one scene, an electric iron is used in a way that would probably make you cross your legs. The bad guys all deserve it, especially the little bald bloke.  

3/5

 

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Space Truckers (1996) Amazon Prime

Dennis Hopper is the space trucker in question, he gets a job hauling a top-secret cargo to Earth. The problem with this film is it's not enough of anything to make it special: it's not camp enough, not tongue-in-cheek enough, not really funny enough although it clearly is trying. Mind you, Charles Dance in full pantomime villain mode trying to get his robo-manhood going with an outboard motor-style ripcord did make me laugh out loud. It has this brightly-lit, dayglo, colourful look to it that is appealing and suits the tone. It wants to be a cult classic, and I guess that's in the eye of the viewer, for me though there's not much of a film here, despite it being mildly diverting.

 

2.5/5

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2 hours ago, neoELITE said:

Bad Day for The Cut

Netlix. 

An Irish farmer seeks revenge after his elderly mother is murdered. It's quite a tight story, believable cast and brutal. In one scene, an electric iron is used in a way that would probably make you cross your legs. The bad guys all deserve it, especially the little bald bloke.  

3/5

 

Thanks for the tip on this one. Here's my review:

 

Decent revenge thriller that manages to go beyond merely brutal with and brings up an interesting dilemma for the Irish farmer out to get revenge on the people who killed his mother. He learns more about her past as he brings no-nonsense, bloody justice. It's slow and heavy like a smack with a big hammer but the pace is just right. I can imagine some of the genuine Northern Irish dialogue would need to be subtitled for some, it just added more depth to the farmer's character, added some authenticity. Yeah, enjoyed it.

 

3.5/5

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On 29/07/2021 at 17:29, Jamie John said:

Interstellar (2014)

 

image.png.124d9dd4b3511a4867599143620567d0.png

 

I've seen this a couple of times now and I think it's perhaps just a bit too ambitious to really make sense, even at almost three hours long. The plot doesn't bear that much close scrutiny before you start to notice the holes, and it doesn't quite stick the landing, for me, anyway.

 

As ever with Nolan, however, the production values, score and some of the imagery is through the roof, so those three hours pass by very quickly. I really loved McConaughey's performance, too - there were a couple of scenes between him and his daughter that surprisingly choked me up.

 

Even if it doesn't quite pull it off, more films like this that focus on the unknowability of space, glimpsing into the infinite void, and all the rest of it, can only be a good thing.

 

4/5

 

Has anyone read the book that came out with it, The Science of Interstellar? It was written by a Nobel Prize-winning physicist who acted as a consultant for the film, apparently. I wonder how accessible it is.

This is my favourite movie of all time, if I had to pick one. It's definitely not perfect, and there are absolutely better films, but for me, the combination of the IMAX scenes, the amazing soundtrack, the scale of the film (Nolan's team grew their own bloody corn fields to fuck about with!) it's just a masterpiece for me. :wub:

 

In other news, I just watched The Professor (Johnny Depp) on Prime video. A nice movie, which I had no idea existed, where Johnny Depp plays someone who is a terminally ill professor, living out his final days. Also, basically drunk all the time. I wonder how much was acted!? Worth a watch. 6.5/10.

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Cardboard Gangsters (2017) Netflix

You've seen this story many times before: low-level drug-dealing street crims try and work their way up the scale to become the big guys, tread on a few toes along the way, nothing goes smoothly. Largely predictable but enjoyable Irish crime saga, rough and brutal, just enough grit. Some decent twists towards the end.

 

3/5

 

 

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After loving The Green Knight, thought I should check out more of David Lowery’s work.

 

Ain't Them Bodies Saints - 4/5

 

I love these modern takes on westerns we’re getting a lot of these days (Hell Or High Water, First Cow). Great performances all round,but particularly by Ben Foster who just seems to be great in everything he does.

 

A Ghost Story - 5/5

 

wow, I simply loved this film. I remember hearing the premise when it came out and dismissing it as probably over artsy and dull. How wrong I was. Lowery is such an assured director and sweeps you along in this truly unique film. Death and mortality is something that’s unfortunately become all to real in my life recently which made this really hit home. I already want to watch it again.

 

I’m now a card carrying Lowery fan. Can’t believe I missed all these film. The Old Man And The Gun, and Pete’s Dragon next.

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7 hours ago, uglifruit said:

Coco. (Pixar)

Bloody great.  Touching, in a good way, funny, and great music/songs.  Also interesting to see they've worked hard to animate the fingers when guitar playing realistically, and looks 'right'.

 

5 out of 5 (tears).


Oh man. Its a brilliant film. Its extra special to me as I studied in Mexico and the mythology is very meaningful.  The whole ending sequence had me in floods of tears. Then I managed to compose myself and….. 

Spoiler

The fucking ghost of grandma appears, singing and smiling, and im a mess again

 

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23 hours ago, Vimster said:

Cardboard Gangsters (2017) Netflix

You've seen this story many times before: low-level drug-dealing street crims try and work their way up the scale to become the big guys, tread on a few toes along the way, nothing goes smoothly. Largely predictable but enjoyable Irish crime saga, rough and brutal, just enough grit. Some decent twists towards the end.

 

3/5

 

 

There's an annoying trope that I've starting noticing in all these kinds of films :

Spoiler

The main character could get away, but always goes back fir no good reason and gets killed. 

 

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2 minutes ago, ScouserInExile said:

There's an annoying trope that I've starting noticing in all these kinds of films :

  Hide contents

The main character could get away, but always goes back fir no good reason and gets killed. 

 

Worse:

Spoiler

Main character falls for main rival's girlfriend. Every time.

 

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Old (2021) Movie theater

 

As you might expect from an M. Night Shymalan movie, the plot is predictable, convoluted, and constructed almost entirely of holes. The ending is trite and convenient, and the acting is for the most part wooden and terrible. As is the writing! Fuck me, at times I was convinced that he was trying to emulate old Clue-style movies, but I think it's actually just a bad movie. None of the people behave like human beings, for the most part. It's like an AI has watched a whole bunch of bad movies and thought "Ah yes, this is what people are like" and then written all the dialogue.

 

Still, it's an interesting premise I guess and sort of tense at times.

 

2/5

 

 

 

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2 hours ago, Floshenbarnical said:

Old (2021) Movie theater

 

As you might expect from an M. Night Shymalan movie, the plot is predictable, convoluted, and constructed almost entirely of holes. The ending is trite and convenient, and the acting is for the most part wooden and terrible. As is the writing! Fuck me, at times I was convinced that he was trying to emulate old Clue-style movies, but I think it's actually just a bad movie. None of the people behave like human beings, for the most part. It's like an AI has watched a whole bunch of bad movies and thought "Ah yes, this is what people are like" and then written all the dialogue.

 

Still, it's an interesting premise I guess and sort of tense at times.

 

2/5

 

 

 

 

I found it got old real quick.

 

Arf!

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Batman (1989)

 

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I haven't seen this in at least twenty years. I didn't really think it held up all that well. The best thing about it is the art and set design - Gotham feels and looks like Gotham should, certainly compared with the Nolan Batman films, where Gotham is just modern-day Chicago. Danny Elfman's iconic score is also great - the classic sequence with the Batmobile driving through the leaves and the music surging is just as effective as I (vaguely) remember it from my childhood.

 

In most other respects, though, this felt pretty sub-par. The characterisation of Batman himself is weak. Keaton spends most of the film looking like he's half-asleep and just doesn't strike as an intimidating enough figure, as neither Bruce Wayne nor Batman, and certainly not as the world's greatest detective. I think the biggest issue is that he's just not given enough screen-time or lines to develop, especially at the beginning of the film. It almost feels like you're watching a sequel, where the character and his motivations and so on was established in the first movie. The robotic way he moves when he's in the suit is also pretty comical. This isn't his fault (the rubber suit didn't let him move his neck), but it still makes him look like C3-PO, turning his entire body to move.

 

Nicholson's Joker is pretty inconsistent, I thought. He's better at the beginning of the movie, when he's still the traitorous crime lieutenant Jack Napier. After he turns into the Joker, a lot of the time he comes across as just high more than insane and seems to be phoning it in a lot, especially if you compare his performance as a homicidal maniac in this with The Shining, where he's a lot more convincing.


Mostly, though the tone of the film overall seems all over the place. On the one hand you've got this very dark, brooding presentation of the city with its gothic towers, rain, mist and steaming vents. You've got a character who electrocutes another until he literally combusts and is left as a charred skeleton. You've got characters being dropped into vats of boiling acid so they're left permanently disfigured. Then, on the other hand, you've got bits which are goofy as fuck, akin to the 60s TV show. Like when the Joker and his cronies vandalise the museum while dancing to Prince on their comedy oversized boombox. What was that about? It was horrible. Or the bits where Joker uses his props (where he even got these from, I'm not sure), like his revolver with its four foot barrel, that's apparently powerful enough to blow up the Batwing with one shot. Or the bit where he does the parody TV advert for the cosmetic products he's tampered with, and is somehow able to forcibly take over every network in the city. How?

 

It was just jarring. I get that this is a movie based on a comic book character, but it's also a 15-rated film featuring frequent gun violence and mass shootings and, a lot of the time, is obviously going for a noir-ish, menacing atmosphere. Yet it features lots of scenes that wouldn't be out of place on a children's matinee show.

 

I dunno. Maybe I'm way off. This came out the year before I was born and, like Dawn of the Dead, which I wrote about a few weeks ago, I suspect for a lot of people it's a film that is impossible to divorce from the context in which it was released and is never going to have the same impact 32 years later, but I can't truthfully say I enjoyed it that much. I'll get round to watching Batman Returns at some point. Maybe that'll be better.

 

2/5

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That's completely fair. I'm not a sentimental person, and rewatched it recently with the scales removed. Its clear now it was a huge success because of a couple of factors... Well, because of the marketing campaign as much as anything, but film wise yeah, a couple of things. 

 

Firstly, the relative freshness of Tim Burton's approach. He was an animator and puppeteer given the keys to the kingdom, and made a genuinely unique film. It doesn't hold together well in retrospect (you rightly mention tone, but the pacing is horrible as well) but it was one of the first films of the new post-Reagan era to be completely non-conservative and artist-led in approach. 

 

Secondly, it married the TV Batman bif-pow-sock kitsch with the darker tone of the early comics. Not the brutal and uncompromising world of Frank Miller's Dark Knight but the heavy contrast, noirish 40s stuff which Burton interpreted into a pastiche of German Expressionism. The callbacks were a great way to utilise the ol' memberberries. 

 

It's a huge pop-cultural touchstone that changed the approach to fantasy cinema for a good decade - until The Matrix came out - but as a film by itself? Deeply flawed. 

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