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Rate the last film you watched out of 5


Raoull duke
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Kung Pow: Enter The Fist (2002)

Completely ridiculous from start to finish, it never lets up, commits wholeheartedly to the OTT silliness with a passion. Some of the humour doesn't hit home but there's so much going on you're never far away from a decent laugh. Go near any comments section attached to a clip of this and you'll see how quotable this film is too. I can imagine this really getting on some people's nerves it's so relentless but I got plenty of laughs out of it so there you go.

 

3.5/5

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12 minutes ago, Nathan Wind said:

It's brilliant! One of the best spoof movies for sure.  Have you seen Loaded Weapon?  Outside the Naked Gun and Hot Shots films that's probably my favourite, followed by Kung Pow.

Saw Loaded Weapon a good 20 years ago. The bits I only remember were the fact it's an early appearance by Samuel L Jackson plus Scotty having trouble with the coffee machine. Should watch it again really.

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1 hour ago, Nathan Wind said:

It's brilliant! One of the best spoof movies for sure.  Have you seen Loaded Weapon?  Outside the Naked Gun and Hot Shots films that's probably my favourite, followed by Kung Pow.

 

Top Secret is a must-watch too.

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18 minutes ago, Talvalin said:

No love for Black Dynamite guys? My favourite parody film.

Uh huh, it's fantastic.  I was looking forward to The Outlaw Johnny Black but it's gone very quiet, although MJW's website still says it's in production.

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Just back from the cinema!!

 

Peter Rabbit 2: The Runaway

 

It was surprisingly okay. Some actually funny jokes and a decent cast (no Daisy Ridley, though).

 

Some of the Abdominal Gleeson CG slapstick was hokey as hell but it kept my 6 year old giggling for the majority and there were even a couple of guffaws.

 

3 anthropomorphic rabbits / 5.

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Cruella (2021)

 

Second trip back to the cinema, and I expected this one to be absolute dreck.

 

Glad to say it's not! It never quite gels enough to be a campstravaganza, but is elevated by amazing, hammy performances by Emmas Stone and Thompson, and a scene-stealing turn from the guy playing Horace (Paul Walter Houser).

 

If you like this level of frenzy and frantic kitsch, you'll be well served. It's nailed-on to be a cult favourite.

 

***

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Honest Thief - 2/5. 

 

By the numbers typical Neeson action fodder. Dull, but not terrible by any means. 

 

King of New York - 3/5

 

I remember first seeing it when it came out about what, 30 years ago? I thought it was dark and great. Watching it now, jesus... its something all right (certainly dated in some aspects). Theres a strangeness to it that just leaves you uncomfortable, and i dont mean because of the violence or anything. Theres a tone to it like a fever dream. Oh and Larry Fishburne is so over the top its hilarious. 

 

 

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Spiral: From the Book of Saw (2021)

 

Someone wanted to make a modern day Se7en but as it's no where near as good they tacked the SAW franchise on to try and bring the people in. You can see the twist coming a mile off, even the editing basically shows you what's going on and then reminds you of it all again near the end. Seems to end really quickly too, like they were running out of time and had to get it over with. With a few tweaks in the editing this could have been better. Chris Rock was decent in the lead though.

 

2/5

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A Quiet Place Double Bill

 

I braved the cinema with my son to watch both movies in a double bill. 
 

We’d seen the first one and enjoyed it and had always thought it would have been an interesting experience at the cinema. Which it was but if you’ve already seen it, it loses a fair bit of the impact as you would imagine. 
 

The sequel was ok. Loved the opening flashback to Day 1. Cillian Murphy is always good to watch as is Emma Blunt but the story is a bit like a video game. Characters rarely act believably. At times it was like watching a live action version of The Last of Us. At one point there’s even a bit where a character walks through an abandoned train instead of walking around it. 
 

They’re obviously setting this up as a trilogy at least I’d say and I’ll be curious enough to watch the next one too. Like the first one, it’s a pretty tight movie around the 90 min mark and doesn’t outstay it’s welcome but can’t say I wasn’t slightly disappointed. 
 

3.5/5

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The Magnificent Seven (2016)

Been watching a lot of Denzel Washington films recently and this was pretty decent - though I have to admit that I've not seen the original film, only Seven Samurai. Lots of beautiful wide shots showing off the landscape to set the scene and building up of the various characters before the absolute carnage of the showdown.

3/5

 

Midsommar (2020)

An oddly disturbing folk horror set almost entirely in broad daylight, the various characters did seem oddly unconcerned by their friends disappearing one by one, apart from the emotionally traumatised main character whom was being gaslighted at almost every turn.

3.5/4

 

Philadelphia (1993)

Though the two central performances from Hanks and Washington as Andy Beckett and Joe Miller were outstanding, along with Jonathan Demme's superb direction, the arc of Miller's bigoted lawyer was far less transformative than the film makes it out to be. Also the focus on Miller's perception of Beckett and Beckett's loving but exceedingly straight family, versus showing more about Beckett himself and his gay friends was a choice that I can't really get behind. Perhaps this is just my feeling from 2021 being unfairly projected back in time 30 years but anyway.

3.5/5

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There's stupid stuff in it for sure, but Blomkamp does mechanized carnage really really well. I wish he had had a proper shot at doing a Halo or Alien-related film (equal potential of being great or terrible, but I still would have watched them either way).

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The Founder - 4/5. Michael Keaton portrays Ray Kroc, the man responsible for franchising McDonald's. I couldn't tell whether he was supposed to be a villain or not, but I liked him.

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Spiderman: Far from home

I've now seen all of the Marvel films since this appeared on Netflix. Like Homecoming it's an enjoyable film with an entertaining lead and cast and sits above average amongst the marvel films. 

 

I found this one quite poor for nearly half of the film however. I can see what they are going for with the teen drama awkwardness but it fell flat here and felt more forced than the previous entry. The way it handled the post-endgame elements was also a bit tame but it would have been difficult to balance that and any new plot. Thankfully the film eventually picks up and I thought it had some genuinely great set-pieces, so long as you don't think about it too much. 

 

Jake Gyllenhaal was good and his character was more interesting than many, though the film had echos of another marvel entry... I feel they could have done a lot more with him, and maybe they will. 

 

Special nod to the two post-film scenes, which made me excited to see the next one. 

 

3/5

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Army of the Dead - on Netflix now

 

Scoring stuff out of 5 is really hard. My gut says 4/5 because it’s really pretty good and I enjoyed it a lot. But then it’s obviously nowhere near hundreds of other actually proper 4/5 movies, like nearly every Scorsese film and Avatar (joke). 

 

It’s a 7.75/10. So someone else can do the maths. It’s a different zombie movie. The music is great. Bautista is himself. There are some good lines. There’s a really well crafted fight scene between a woman and the undead, that is probably one of the best human vs zombie fights I’ve ever seen. I’m trying to put my finger on why. Probably because she’s not super martial arts or anything. It’s all believable if you’re strong and smart. 
 

The use of, what I believe are dancers and free runners, as

Spoiler

some of the

zombies is clever, but the drawn out sequences came across as naff and cringe to me rather than awesome. Oh, and there’s a 

Spoiler

zombie tiger. Which I wish had realistic proportions and didn’t look like Dave Bautista as a tiger, and moved like a tiger actually does. But I’m really picky when it comes to animal CGI.


Oh, and another thing I’m a stickler for, in a really annoying to those around me and in a morbid way.....injury and death detail. 
 

Drowned two days ago? “He wouldn’t look like that”.

Hit by a bus and went under the wheels? “He wouldn’t look like that”.

Crushed anything? “He wouldn’t look like that!!”

 

This was actually more accurate that gory with some amazing detail to wound design. It’s a career I wish I could have gone into, if only for a bit. So I have a real appreciation for seeing something that’s not over or under played. For me, it prevents the movie from being a silly zombie movie, whilst still providing some shock and laugh kills. 
 

 

Watch it cos you’ll probably enjoy it. 

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I love Contact. It’s got one of the best “sciencey bits” of any movie. I always enjoy the science stuff before the action. Volcano, The Core; stuff like that. It’s a great movie. 

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Captain Fantastic

 

I finally got around to watching this, the initial draw being the always excellent Viggo Mortensen but for years I was put off by the name and the poster. Really glad I did as its rather magnificent! Watch the first 5 minutes if you're on the fence with it. George MacKay is really good in it, but to be fair all the young cast are on top form.

 

4/5

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A Quiet Place Part II - 3.5/5

 

First trip to the cinema since last summer and not a bad film at all.  Lean, suspenseful, great opening prologue and a very strong ‘Last of Us’ vibe in the middle 3rd which was no bad thing. 

 

 

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Cruella (2021)

 

Did we need this film? Not at all. But was it a lot of fun? Very much so. It got a little soap opera-esq in the last act but there was plenty of fun and laugh out loud moments throughout to make it enjoyable. I enjoyed a lot of the high jinks and heist stuff they littered throughout.

Its clear to see that Emma Stone and Emma Thompson are having an absolute blast and Stone in particular plays the part so well. They're both hamming it up beautifully. I also liked how Horace and Jasper were more than just henchmen, there was an actual bond between the three. Along with the dogs they were a great gang.

The costumes, aesthetics & set designs are fantastic and the mid credits scene was also a really nice touch.

It is however way too long and needs a good 20 minutes shaving off.

 

3/5

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