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Raoull duke

Rate the last film you watched out of 5

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Who wants to read or listen to full reviews when they're trying to pick something to watch. Let's assign numerical values to films based on whatever criteria we see fit. A line or two about the film is optional. 

 

I'll go first:

 

The Prestige 3/5 

 

Not nearly as clever as I had been laid to believe it was. In the parlance of the film, the pledge was great. The turn was great. The prestige was a big wet fart.

 

CBGB 0/5

 

Quite possibly the worst film I've ever seen. Every single important element of the film is wrong. 

 

RoboCop 4/5

 

Hadn't seen it since I was about ten and watched it on Netflix expecting it to be trashy shit. It was surprisingly great. Far more violent than I remember. 

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The Island Of Doctor Moreau (1977) - I’ll give it three out of five.

 

The acting was quite jolly, and it’s a decent watch but it just tramples all the fun out of the book.

  • Upvote 2

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John Wick 3 - 3/5

 

Like the second sequel to a game you enjoyed where most of the core gameplay hasn't changed much since the original, yes it's "bigger and better", but also boring at the same time. Lots and lots of massive fight scenes where a stream of anonymous baddies get shot in the head with zero sense of danger to the goodies. Oh, that's the guy from The Raid!

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  • Empathy 1

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A Clockwork Orange - 5/5

 

I had forgotten completely about the scene where Alex is bashing one out, and Kubrick gives you flashes of what's going on in his head... which includes a woman being hanged. So fucked up. 

  • Upvote 4

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Shazam - 4/5

 

Hardly a classic, but a daft, fun and family-friendly superhero film from the DC universe. It feels like a Deadpool film that you could watch with an eight year old.

  • Upvote 3

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Jim & Andy: The Great Beyond - 4/5

 

Fascinating insight into Jim Carrey "becoming" Andy Kaufman with some behind the scenes footage that had apparently been embargoed by the movie studio for 20 years

  • Upvote 1

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One Upon a Time in Holywood

 

Pretty good film, but if I had known what was going to happen at the end, the whole thing would have a been a massive waste of time really. 

 

3.5/5

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Goodfellas 5/5

I love Scorcese, Dr Niro and Pesci so this is maybe the pinnacle for all three as Casino was too long and Raging Bull lacked a deep supporting cast. It's just wonderful, violent, funny, shocking and heart warming in places. Scorsese's Mum's cameo is the heart warming element. Everything about it is perfect.

I've seen it at least ten times. 

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John Wick 2 - 2/5

 

I thought this was pretty poor, tbh, all of the action scenes are the same.

 

And while they'd clearly got a bigger budget and the ability to film in some important locations, they clearly didn't have the ability to close them down for filming, so the whole back half of the film is undermined by them firing off shots in front of indifferent NY commuters.

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Angel Has Fallen - 2/5. 

As someone who loved 'Olympus' and hated 'London', I wasnt all that bothered by watching this but my other half wanted to go. It's better than 'London', but that's not saying much. Please let the series die now.

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Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark - 3/5

 

Not great but not bad, whilst it wasn't very scary, it did have a few stand out scenes. Enjoyable! Terrible film name though.

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Godzilla King Of The Monsters...2/5

 

...without the utterly charmless human cast, I might have given it a 3.

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The Running Man - 3 Arnie growl-grunts out of 5

 

Such is the megawatt star power of Arnie that he totally rescues this film from garbage tier. Paul Michael Glaser (who played Starskey and/or Hutch, CBA looking it up) directs this like steering a turd in a bath. He makes a modest-budget film look enormously cheap. It stars a bunch of non-actors and a criminally wasted Yaphet Kotto and so on and so on.

 

And yet Arnold manages to wrest the controls from Glaser and makes it a great star vehicle with stupid but charming one-liners, and hefty combat. It's just good fun.

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Dunkirk - 3/5

Maybe I'd have been more impressed watching it in IMAX as intended. People keep getting on boats which keep sinking. I bet Christopher Nolan wished Spielberg hadn't done the D-Day landings quite so well first time around so he could have had a go.

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The Towering Inferno (1974) - 3/5

 

I watched this a couple of days ago for the first time and its quite impressive given it was made 45 years ago. It goes on a tad too long and some of its silly but there are many good edge of your seat action moments plus it has a moral message at the end.

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The Kid who would be King - 2/5

 

Would have worked much better as a kids tv series. It's poor, boring and the kids unlikeable.

 

 

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Ready or Not - 2/5

 

Started the right kind of weird, middle sagged too much, ending jolted life into things. Numbers crunched, it comes back a 2.

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Dragged Across Concrete 4/5

 

Went In with very low expectations as it seemed to get no buzz on release, ended up really liking it. My favourite Zahler film so far.

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12 minutes ago, Retroid said:

My Cousin Vinny 3/5

 

Not a bad film but it felt a little unstructured and hammy in places.


I would give this Marisa Tomei/5

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Godzilla King of The Monsters: Only watched the first hour and was utterly bored. Eleven from Stranger things was in it and she cried. She's one of the worst criers on film but gets paid handsomely, so fair play. I also didn't recognise the monsters apart from the butterfly moth thing and Godzilla. At one point they started going on about shagging monsters or something so I turned it off. I was browsing amazon on my phone at that point. Not into bestiality. 

 

A solid 0/5.

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  • Empathy 1

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