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Elden Ring - chortlesome japes


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35 hours in and 3 Great Runes and I have finally ditched my starting armour at level 60. Not the starting weapon though, haven't found anything better than my stupid broadsword +15, except maybe my morning star, which is sadly stuck at +10. I was starting to regret going strength / faith, but I've got a couple of incantations and ashes that seem useful now. IDK if they're going to edge out blood slash though, which is still absurdly strong!

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12 minutes ago, Kryptonian said:

What do these icons mean?

 

I’m 40 hours in and have no idea

 

F11B649B-30BD-417A-B90E-924030DBC6B1.thumb.jpeg.997a07decdb753eab4ae2384f7701020.jpeg

My informed guesswork, from left to right:

Spoiler
  1. A HP buff, maybe from something you have equipped.
  2. Don't know. A Talisman effect, perhaps?
  3. A HP debuff, likely from being held by Fia; you have to use the item you get from her to eventually get rid of the affliction.
  4. A boost to the number of Runes/souls you gain.

 

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I had no idea 

Spoiler

Fia

drained your health.

Spoiler

Vampire witch!

 

I thought my HP looked relatively low, too. I must have first hugged her after about 5 hours of play and that red icon has been there the entire time. I've run up another 25 hours since then :facepalm:

 

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31 minutes ago, imp said:

35 hours in and 3 Great Runes and I have finally ditched my starting armour at level 60. Not the starting weapon though, haven't found anything better than my stupid broadsword +15, except maybe my morning star, which is sadly stuck at +10. I was starting to regret going strength / faith, but I've got a couple of incantations and ashes that seem useful now. IDK if they're going to edge out blood slash though, which is still absurdly strong!

 

Nice one! I'm only at level 30 but am playing a Confessor with a morning star +8, and was starting to lose faith in the build as I'm still mostly relying on meat-'n'-potatoes melee attacks, but I got the Bloody Slash technique from Fort Haight the other day and finally have a flame incantation that doesn't seem terrible, so now I'm hopeful I can get over the hump.

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21 minutes ago, Ferine said:

My informed guesswork, from left to right:

  Hide contents
  1. A HP buff, maybe from something you have equipped.
  2. Don't know. A Talisman effect, perhaps?
  3. A HP debuff, likely from being held by Fia; you have to use the item you get from her to eventually get rid of the affliction.
  4. A boost to the number of Runes/souls you gain.

 

 

Ah thanks.

 

I saw something about the debuff the other day, I best look into that.

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30 minutes ago, Klatrymadon said:

 

Nice one! I'm only at level 30 but am playing a Confessor with a morning star +8, and was starting to lose faith in the build as I'm still mostly relying on meat-'n'-potatoes melee attacks, but I got the Bloody Slash technique from Fort Haight the other day and finally have a flame incantation that doesn't seem terrible, so now I'm hopeful I can get over the hump.

 

Yeah, I was a bit frustrated with the lack of cool stuff to do with str/faith between levels 30 and 50, which was compounded by all the lovely DEX/INT stuff I was finding, so basically spent most levels pumping VIT to 30 as I didn't have anything to make use of STR scaling, but now I've got a couple of more toys I'm enjoying the build again. STR/FTH has always been more of an endgame build, so I'm sure it'll only get better from here. Anyway, bog standard dodge and counter souls gameplay is still solid fun!

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6 minutes ago, moosegrinder said:

The cat face cunts in the Catacombs can fucking do one. Massive fucking cheesy bell end arseholes.


The little Imp guys? Pure cunts. I just did a particularly nasty one

Spoiler

(Cliffbottom in Liurnia)

and it’s the first time I’ve been properly enraged by the game 

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Found this games version of the gimmick boss tonight.

 

Then found what I consider to be the best Ash Summon in the game

 

This game just keeps on giving and giving

 

If anyone needs any help with early bosses on PS5 or fancies some jolly coop, let me know

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Just got to Godrick. Annoying as all fuck! First half is ridiculously easy but the 2nd half is daft as a brush. I can’t even get near him, he just does attack after attack using fire. It’s also way too easy to get stuck on the scenery, as you can’t judge what’s around you, which means you’re instantly dead.

 

Also, surely this isn’t the end of Stormveil castle? The start of it was really cool after exploring for so long in the open world, but it’s been bog standard stuff so far and I’ve zoomed through it in no time. Hopefully there’s more to it.

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Inspired by @John0 above, I also decided to give the Crucible Twat another go. And...

 

Spoiler

 

 

Got 'im!

 

You'll notice my technique is a lot more reckless than John0's very measured, patient play :lol:

 

Fuck, that felt good.

 

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Just done him. Just needed to keep rolling back on his big fire attack, before rolling through the sideways one then running and strong jump attacking him. Getting stuck on the scenery is frustrating  but overall enjoyed that boss. Thought it was a lot  easier than Margit, as you can see all his moves coming a mile off.
 

Ah right, so there’s more of the Castle to come. Nice! 
 

Still not used any of the Ashes and LT stuff, or the summons. Feel like it might make things a bit too easy so far. No doubt I’ll hit a brick wall at some point though! 

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2 minutes ago, CrichStand said:

Just done him. Just needed to keep rolling back on his big fire attack, before rolling through the sideways one then running and strong jump attacking him. Getting stuck on the scenery is frustrating  but overall enjoyed that boss. Thought it was a lot  easier than Margit, as you can see all his moves coming a mile off.
 

Ah right, so there’s more of the Castle to come. Nice! 
 

Still not used any of the Ashes and LT stuff, or the summons. Feel like it might make things a bit too easy so far. No doubt I’ll hit a brick wall at some point though! 


Less more of the castle to come, more more of the castle behind you. 

 

Im a bit bored of my strength build, going to respec into heavy strength and faith, go for a fire and lightning and holy paladin type of thing. 

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Got to go to the tower I found earlier now and there’s a door opened up going forwards. I’m going to have to force myself to switch it off, as I need to get some sleep as I’m working tmw. Too easy to go “yeah, I’ll just see what’s at the Tower” and then it’ll be “wonder what’s behind that door I saw earlier” and on and on and next thing it’s 5am. Lol.

 

It’s weird, the hardest bit I’ve hit yet were the rats in one specific room. Kept slaughtering me over and over. The bosses have been no problem so far in comparison. Glad I found this Grafted Greatsword as the fights would have gone on for days without it! 

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1 minute ago, CrichStand said:

It’s weird, the hardest bit I’ve hit yet were the rats in one specific room. Kept slaughtering me over and over. The bosses have been no problem so far in comparison. Glad I found this Grafted Greatsword as the fights would have gone on for days without it! 

 

This is the FROM way. Spend hours figuring out a boss, get killed by a rat or mosquito and lose everything.

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Yeah, I’ve always loved that on these games. You always have to be on your toes, it keeps you engaged at all times. The minute you drop your guard there’s always something that will whack you over the head......often literally! 😄

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40 minutes ago, Doctor Shark said:


Less more of the castle to come, more more of the castle behind you. 

 

Im a bit bored of my strength build, going to respec into heavy strength and faith, go for a fire and lightning and holy paladin type of thing. 

That’s what I’ve done and I’m enjoying it a lot more. I’m like Zeus now, it’s awesome.

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As an almost-total newbie to Soulslikes (I played a couple of hours of the first Dark Souls years ago) I'm enjoying this.

 

I've just got to Margit and I can see why someone described them as a 'tutorial boss' - the moves are clearly delineated and the dodge timing is relatively easy to achieve. Not that I've come close to defeating them obvs. 

 

So far my least favourite enemy is probably the humble pack of dogs. Wankers. Castle Morne entrance absolutely sucked until I realised I could sic giant helmet guy on everybody. 

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Did a tiny half hour of exploring Stormveil before bed.. There were a few treasures I'd seen on my way through that I'd not managed to get, and I needed to fully clear the ambushes / defenses in the courtyards and go treasure hunting. 

 

Trying to get one of the treasures, behind a sneaky locked door in the room with the 'minor' Grafted enemy, ended up with me doing some proper batman shit across rooftops. I fell off while finding my way, through a weird looking hole in the floor.  I thought I'd hit a killbox / death, but I ended up eventually hitting the floor.. 

 

Spoiler

What the fuuuuuuck is at the very bottom of this place?!  I landed on a huge face?!  Something huge came out of the ground just as the screen faded to black! Wtfffff! Omg I hope I can find a way down here properly and have a look around! :D

 

Why is all this stuff optional?! Amazing scenes. It boggles my mind, the amount of stuff in this videogame that most people will never, ever see.. 

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@robdood What's going to weird you out even more is when you realise what you've picked up from off that face...

 

Anyway, spent a wonderful evening on this again, just pootling about and exploring Liurnia, which is beautiful. Killed a few bosses, took some screenshots, raided some tombs, levelled up a few times and generally just soaked it all in as much as I could.

 

What a game. 34 hours played and level 50 now. I feel like I should be keeping a diary or something to keep track of all my adventures. I'm making notes on all the lore still, but the game is rife with incidental things that happen which I want to remember as well.

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5 hours ago, John0 said:

Crucible Knight is down! Really enjoyed that fight. So much so I didn't want to use any summons or anything and just pure 1v1 him (though no idea if I've overlelled at this point). Took a fair few goes to learn roll timings and I struggled to find openings in the 2nd phase but I ground him down eventually. Video in spoiler below if anyone fancies watching.

 

Incidentally I'd very welcome more boss fight videos in this thread! Interested to see everyone's different approaches.

 

 

Howls of derision at all of the shielding no doubt ;)

 

Nice one mate, enjoyed watching this! This has been my favourite fight so far too.

 

Found this place you all were taking screenshots of earlier. What the fuck is that in the chair?!!

 

Spoiler

image.png.d21efce28fc2c4487c014fa0ff48eada.png

 

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5 minutes ago, Jamie John said:

What's going to weird you out even more is when you realise what you've picked up from off that face...

What. 

 

(don't tell me) 

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Jesus. The battle with 

Spoiler

Agheel 

made me feel like fucking Ron Howard or something! The cinematography during the battle is amazing. His reach is enormous, so as you’re riding around whilst focusing on him, you have this amazing angle from your horse to view the whole scene. 
 

It really was epic. And really realistic too! A couple of times 

Spoiler

he flew up and landed on the cliffs around the water. And if you could, you could ride up to continue battling him.


He went somewhere inaccessible at one point though, and was directly above me as I pointlessly tried to smash his glitching arse. And then he

Spoiler

curled his neck down the side of the cliff and breathed fire along the entire length of it, toasting half my health away :lol: fucking hax angle I swear. 


The game actually reset him back to the middle a couple of times, but never replenished the health. It was fun when diverting 

Spoiler

the fire


took me through a fucking camp of soldiers. And by fun I mean shite. 
 

 

But yeah, I’m actually sad it’s over. I love how the surrounding area takes a unique beating, so now that area is 

Spoiler

burnt out in random places with some of the trees gone and some still standing. 


 

Best moment of the game yet. And that’s not even mentioning how he appears!!! Scared the life out of me

Spoiler

landing like a fucking goose on ice. I’m glad I steered my 7 year old away from that ring of mobs the other day now!

 

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