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No Time To Die: Bond 25 - Delayed Yet Again to November 2021


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3 hours ago, GwiDan said:

Do people really not like Tomorrow Never Dies? I always really enjoyed it, Brosnan was still good in it, Teri Hatcher and Michelle Yeoh were great,  and Jonathan Pryce played a villain that’s become ever more believable. The stealth ship was cool, as were all the Royal Navy scenes given that the series seems to forget that Bond is meant to be an RN Commander. Much better film than The World is Not Enough. 

They could recycle the plot of TND for the next film and the central premise would still work. ‘Cept the bad guy would have to be a Murdoch/Zuckerberg/Musk expy rather than Murdoch/Gates.

 

(If anything, TND might be more relevant now, given the rise of various unhinged billionaires who essentially are Bond supervillains – but in real life.)

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18 minutes ago, Protocol Penguin said:

They could recycle the plot of TND for the next film and the central premise would still work. ‘Cept the bad guy would have to be a Murdoch/Zuckerberg/Musk expy rather than Murdoch/Gates.

 

This is essentially the plot of the latest Johnny English film.

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Having a media baron as the villain IS a good idea, but it’s pretty much the only noteworthy thing about Tomorrow Never Dies. Michelle Yeoh has anti-chemistry with Brosnan, and despite her inclusion the action scenes are criminally boring.  It’s a load of nothing, neither funny nor exciting.

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The Brosnan era is basically a trilogy of cock teasing, post Goldeneye.

 

What if Bond had to take on Not-Rupert Murdoch and had interactions with a female counterpart played by an actress with history in Hong Kong action movies? Awesome! What if we rushed it and had no memorable action sequences too? ...ooh.

 

What if we take Goldfinger, modernise it, and replace Goldfinger with a woman and try to mix a Dalton take and a Moore take on the same film? Cool...? What if we rushed it, make the plot pointlessly convoluted, cast Denise Richards as a nuclear physicist and have boring action sequences?

 

What if we take Bond and chuck more money than ever at it to bring into the cool new millennium by basically taking a Moore era film and blowing up to 11? Err... Ok, cool...? What if we heavily rely on CGI that will date horrifically, have a central plot point that is basically racist, which is overall appalling regardless, and riddle it with cool stuff from other films? Oh and cast Madonna. And have a villain ham it up to an obscene degree.

 

Brosnan was a good Bond, he just basically only had one good film. And Goldeneye is great, even if it's this weird Cold War holdover that seems slightly anachronistic and has a strange soundtrack and it's the most obvious mirror image villain plot ever (it's just also a fucking good one).

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12 minutes ago, Vimster said:

No riverdancing his way through every scene, no watch.

 

From the sole IMDB review, presumably written by Flatley himself:

Quote

To keep past and present fans happy Flatley produces an incerdible Tap dance sequence where he shoots knives from his shoes

 

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I love fun bond so it’s been a lean few years with Daniel craig

 

as for Brosnan I liked goldeneye and TWINE - the latter wasn’t great but it had Denise Richards as a nuclear fucking scientist :D 
 

I think they wasted Q, money penny and fiennes (and dench) imagine them with a Moore type bond - mwah!

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the issue is they all merge into a turgid morass of film slurry. If you gave me parts of the plots or set pieces for any of the Craig bond films I doubt I could tell you which film they were in apart from a) home alone hilarity in skyfall and b) the casino bits which I would guess at casino royale :D

 

It just isn't bond it is someother worthy action film thing. Mission Impossible films are closer to what Bond should be.

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So I’ve just got out of the multimedia screening of this. You’ll see reviews go live in the next hour. Here’s mine. 
 

I was sitting next to the worst people imaginable. As much as the marketing behind this has been a real attempt to get people back in cinemas for the first time, No Time To Die was a reminder of everything that’s wrong with the experience. There were a few free beers and wines before the screening and the people next to me decided to get absolutely hammered and then talk through the entire first hour and a half. The woman next to me kept grabbing me and asking if I was okay. I told her to “shhh” and then “shut the fuck up” and finally to “just go to the pub, you’ll have a better time, I’ll have a better time.” In the end they left half way through, dropping 2 phones in the process. They got their phones back, proving life is truly kind to shit people. 
 

Anyway the film’s also absolute toilet. Worse than Spectre. BAD. Toilet. 

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3 minutes ago, BitterToad said:

So I’ve just got out of the multimedia screening of this. You’ll see reviews go live in the next hour. Here’s mine. 
 

I was sitting next to the worst people imaginable. As much as the marketing behind this has been a real attempt to get people back in cinemas for the first time, No Time To Die was a reminder of everything that’s wrong with the experience. There were a few free beers and wines before the screening and the people next to me decided to get absolutely hammered and then talk through the entire first hour and a half. The woman next to me kept grabbing me and asking if I was okay. I told her to “shhh” and then “shut the fuck up” and finally to “just go to the pub, you’ll have a better time, I’ll have a better time.” In the end they left half way through, dropping 2 phones in the process. They got their phones back, proving life is truly kind to shit people. 
 

Anyway the film’s also absolute toilet. Worse than Spectre. BAD. Toilet. 


To be fair that does not sound reflective of most trips the flicks.

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1 minute ago, Yiggy said:


To be fair that does not sound reflective of most trips the flicks.

Oh no it’s absolutely a dicks getting free tickets to the multimedia and getting hammered thing. And I’m still 100% pro seeing movies in the cinema. 
 

The film’s really bad though. Like, really really shit. 

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I have no care either way but I would kind of love it to be a steaming turd of a movie just to see the fallout after all this time. I’ve not seen any of them since Casino Royale. Craig takes himself far too seriously for my liking. 

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21 minutes ago, BitterToad said:

So I’ve just got out of the multimedia screening of this. You’ll see reviews go live in the next hour. Here’s mine. 
 

I was sitting next to the worst people imaginable. As much as the marketing behind this has been a real attempt to get people back in cinemas for the first time, No Time To Die was a reminder of everything that’s wrong with the experience. There were a few free beers and wines before the screening and the people next to me decided to get absolutely hammered and then talk through the entire first hour and a half. The woman next to me kept grabbing me and asking if I was okay. I told her to “shhh” and then “shut the fuck up” and finally to “just go to the pub, you’ll have a better time, I’ll have a better time.” In the end they left half way through, dropping 2 phones in the process. They got their phones back, proving life is truly kind to shit people. 
 

Anyway the film’s also absolute toilet. Worse than Spectre. BAD. Toilet. 

 

Put all of that on a poster.

 

I think many forgot that they weren't expecting much from this. The initial trailer was dull as fuck, even 18 months ago.

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18 hours ago, Clipper said:

the issue is they all merge into a turgid morass of film slurry. If you gave me parts of the plots or set pieces for any of the Craig bond films I doubt I could tell you which film they were in apart from a) home alone hilarity in skyfall and b) the casino bits which I would guess at casino royale :D

 

It just isn't bond it is someother worthy action film thing. Mission Impossible films are closer to what Bond should be.


I’ll always remember QoS for the insanely dangerous ‘hotel’ that has highly explosive barrels  everywhere like a video game 

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I notice that coverage of this launch  is even more obnoxious to than usual. The media this morning are acting like you'll start jizzing out of every orifice before the producer splash screens have finished because the film is such a towering achievement of cinema. I suspect it has less to do with any quality the film actually has and more to do with the concerted YAY BREXIT ISN'T BRITAIN GREAT LEVELLING UP messaging we've had to endure from all quarters. As I type this Sky News has a segment that basically boils down to why anyone who has any issues with Bond is probably a commie.

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10 minutes ago, Harsin said:

I notice that coverage of this launch  is even more obnoxious to than usual. The media this morning are acting like you'll start jizzing out of every orifice before the producer splash screens have finished because the film is such a towering achievement of cinema. I suspect it has less to do with any quality the film actually has and more to do with the concerted YAY BREXIT ISN'T BRITAIN GREAT LEVELLING UP messaging we've had to endure from all quarters. As I type this Sky News has a segment that basically boils down to why anyone who has any issues with Bond is probably a commie.

 

YOUR FUTURE QUEEN KATE STUNS IN GOLD AT BOND PREMIERE

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