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Football thread 2014/15 season

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I'm more surprised Raheem Sterling didn't know who Ricky Gervais was.

As much as I think Sterling is fast becoming the best player in England, I also believe he isn't the most intelligent fellow, even for a footballer.

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The way it's going it's going to become a race between Sterling, Barkley and Shaw for the title of most stupid England player.

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As much as I think Sterling is fast becoming the best player in England, I also believe he isn't the most intelligent fellow, even for a footballer.

Not knowing who someone is doesn't mean you're not intelligent though, does it ? Just oblivious, not switched on to the wider world, leading very narrow, football obsessed lives. If they weren't so obsessed and focussed they probably wouldn't be where they are at such a young age. Maybe.

A guest on Newsnight once said they'd never watched an episode of the Simpsons, I suppose if you've not owned a tv for 25 years you might have missed it. Worse, the episode he did watch first, the one with Tony Blair, he thought was good.

But mostly it made me think maybe Sterling is too young to know Gervais.

There's a guardian interview with Michael Owen which made me sad. I got so far through it actually thinking it was made up. He doesn't like music or films. He says he's only seen 5 films in his life.

http://www.theguardian.com/football/2014/aug/15/small-talk-michael-owen

So what makes a good day now? Matchday’s still the highlight of the week. There’s still a buzz when you get to the stadium, and then just before the game, when you’re about to go to work.

That’s amazing. What do you listen to in the car on the way there? I don’t listen to anything. I don’t know why, but the car’s always been my own quiet space. When the kids are in the car they always want a song on, but I’m just happy with my thoughts.

What do the kids listen to? I’ve got three girls and a boy, and the girls are all about One Direction. They know every word to every song. They’ve been to a concert – my wife took them. I couldn’t go because, um, we only bought three tickets.

What’s the last film you saw? It’s very boring, but I don’t watch films. I think I’ve seen about five in my life. I just can’t get into them. I do try – someone will say, ‘Watch this film, it’s great,’ and I’ll try but after half an hour, 40 minutes I can’t take it any longer.

So what were those five? They must have been absolutely terrible. Rocky, Jurassic Park, Cool Runnings, Ghost. Um, I can’t remember any more. [small Talk drums fingers on table encouragingly] Er … and Heat. I’ve seen Heat. I can’t think of any more.

But they’re all ancient! Someone might have made the perfect film in the last 20 years! Maybe. All the films I’ve seen were when I went training with clubs, when I was about 12 and my dad wanted me to visit Arsenal or [Manchester] United or whoever wanted to sign me at the time. A lot of the time you’d go and there would be 20 trialists, all staying together the night before, and instead of sitting all night in the hotel they’d take you to the cinema. And I’d go, ‘Oh no.’

Who would play you in a film of your life? What, an actor? I don’t know any actors.

I suppose you’ve got to pick one from those five films. It’s got to be Sylvester Stallone, because Patrick Swayze and John Candy are out. Tom Cruise is a good-looking fella, he’ll do.

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I work with an otherwise perfectly nice, intelligent girl who didn't know who Bill Murray was.

I'm struggling with this far more than is reasonable. How old is she? Did you spend the rest the day questioning/gawping/throwing copies of Ghostbusters and Groundhog Day at her?

Also, that Michael Owen interview is both quite saddening and entirely unsurprising. He's always been a little odd. He seems less like he should be a pundit/analyst, more like a blood spatter expert in Miami.

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When he was young, he looked like a trainee for CID.

Noel Gallagher, circa 2001: "Y'know Michael Owen and Alan Shearer? They're fucking coppers, man. Alan Shearer is CID and Michael Owen looks like trainee CID. Michael Owen calls Alan Shearer 'Sarge'. 'Alright, Sarge?' I've been busted by Alan Shearer so many times it's unbelievable."

Not a fan of Oasis or him really but this has always stuck in my head, made me chuckle when I read it at the time.

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I'm more surprised Raheem Sterling didn't know who Ricky Gervais was.

To be fair, Gervais is hardly relevant anymore, the kid is what 19, so he would have been 6 when it came out. Not a massive surprise.

I'm more surprised Raheem Sterling didn't know who Ricky Gervais was.

To be fair, Gervais is hardly relevant anymore, the kid is what 19, so he would have been 6 when it came out. Not a massive surprise.

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To be fair, Gervais is hardly relevant anymore, the kid is what 19, so he would have been 6 when it came out. Not a massive surprise.

To be fair, Gervais is hardly relevant anymore, the kid is what 19, so he would have been 6 when it came out. Not a massive surprise.

Gervais is a lot more famous now than when the Office first came out!

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Owen might actually be autistic.

I was cooking Sunday lunch earlier and my daughter ran into the kitchen to tell me that Burt had scored. Burt beat Portsmouth 2-0. Well done Burt.

Albania are beating Portugal.

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Guest

First away win in 4 years and that was probably against San Marino.

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Watching the Scotland game made me hope they vote yes and that I can emigrate. So much better than watching England.

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Watching the Scotland game made me hope they vote yes and that I can emigrate. So much better than watching England.

Could be worse... Portugal 0 - 1 Albania

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Watching the Scotland game made me hope they vote yes and that I can emigrate. So much better than watching England.

Got to give Strachan some credit, as he's got a squad with very little quality in it but at least has them playing reasonably.

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Pretty good from Aidan McGeedy to make it 2-1 to Ireland right at the end. Pretty, pretty, pretty good.

It was a lovely goal, but a total shame the performance was a load of turgid arse. His first came from a hopeful long ball forward in which luck fell Ireland's favour, and the second was a brilliant piece of individual skill, but he was the only man in green who seemed interested in having a pop at goal.

So much hit and hope. It's a squad that lacks the talent it used to have, but there were guys on the bench like Hoolahan who could have come on and changed things up, maybe worked a few chances. I'm pleased to see the three points were won in the end, but the Scotland and Poland games are going to make for pretty poor experiences.

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I don't get it. Are you not allowed to retire from International football?

It sounds like the Mafia. Once you're in, you can't get out.

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