The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild

[the_debaser]

31 minutes ago, Rowan Morrison said:

 

There's a shrine quest around there that's a bit of a drag to complete (fetch and carry), but results in some first-class Goron expressions and dancing. I completed it last night and I really wish the game had a theatre mode for some of the cutscenes.

 

My100% favourite thing about Breath of the Wild now, however, is the level four fairy upgrade sequence (it's replaced Link's expression in the level three sequence). It's a perfect blend of eroticism and stark terror. Those fairies are easily the scariest things in the game.

 

Seems a bit paedo-y then I realise that Link is either 16 years old or 116 and that makes it just as bad. 

[Twinbee]

I'm also in the can't-look-at-real-life-without-thinking-of-Zelda club.

 

Went on a long walk to Malham Cove on Sunday. Went through a wood.

 

Don't tell me there isn't a Korok hiding here:

[SpagMasterSwift]

I just realised how BotW ties in with The Last Guardian...the bombs man, the bombs! *shudder*

[smac]

You heard the dirty chuckle he gets - offscreen - when the Gerudo masseuse giving him the spa treatment clearly realizes he's a Voe? Filthiest thing I've heard in ages.

[Majora]

1 hour ago, the_debaser said:

 

Seems a bit paedo-y then I realise that Link is either 16 years old or 116 and that makes it just as bad. 

 

 

Isn't it just rape, basically? 

 

I mean, without taking it waaaaaay too seriously, imagine it was a male fairy doing that to a female hero. It'd be all kinds of wrong.

 

[smac]

2 hours ago, smac said:

 

Yeah, he tells you the 'worst case' - that she'd be swept all the way to <location>.

 

I spent hours searching it - unless it's like my looking for that last bloody memory, or that eighth bloody heroine. Hmmm. I'm spotting a pattern here...

 

I should have gone to SpecSavers...

 

So, I finally find her. Silly beggar is hanging around an 'island' that is also home to a bunch of lizalfos. So what I thought was a lizalfos swimming patrols is her, fishing. D'oh!

What's irritating is that I must have taken out most of the lizals last time, and got bored with fighting, so deliberately avoided the confrontation that would have been with her.

[Petrousgyre]

52 minutes ago, Rowan Morrison said:

 It's a perfect blend of eroticism and stark terror. Those fairies are easily the scariest things in the game.

 

I'm not one to find much in the way of titillation in video games but there is something strangely sensual about the fairies. I sense that's probably something I shouldn't admit to.

[Girth Certificate]

I'm not feeling it, they all look look RuPaul. The Gerudo women though, spooge mcduck! I kinda expected there to be a side quest involving the Gerudo men but I don't think I've met any.

[Cheeko]

3 hours ago, smac said:

 

Did you take out the bad guys (Lizals, I think) dancing for joy in celebration of their epic find of three Durians? I felt mean, but I guess they're the spawn of evil incarnate.

 

If it's the same cliff shelf as the one I found - right next to a tower.

I did! Yeah, I was trying to get to that tower and it started raining so I figured I'd just stay there for a while, so much to find!

[the_debaser]

13 minutes ago, _Pow_ said:

I'm not feeling it, they all look look RuPaul. The Gerudo women though, spooge mcduck! I kinda expected there to be a side quest involving the Gerudo men but I don't think I've met any.

 

Wonder who all the Gerudo women have been banging as there are no men there 

[Made of Ghosts]

I'm so into the Gerudo matriarchy. It seems like such a nice place to live. I'd totally go to Ashai's relationship classes in the mornings and cookery classes at night.

[smac]

20 minutes ago, the_debaser said:

 

Wonder who all the Gerudo women have been banging as there are no men there 

 

Did you not talk to the lady on the stall on the upper left side? Near the home where the cookery classes take place?

 

She talks about her husband, and says that the married Gerudo live outside the city limits. No idea where, mind; not a lot of other settlements to be found.

 

[SpagMasterSwift]

I'm all about the bird women... 

 

 

[the_debaser]

3 minutes ago, smac said:

 

Did you not talk to the lady on the stall on the upper left side? Near the home where the cookery classes take place?

 

She talks about her husband, and says that the married Gerudo live outside the city limits. No idea where, mind; not a lot of other settlements to be found.

 

 

Nah, I'm slowly making my way through the side quests, decided to approach them in an anti-clockwise motion round the map. I'm up in Akkala/Goron territory at the moment. 

[MojoChin]

4 hours ago, Broker said:

Switch screenshots are lovely:

 

 

 

Christ is that the Switch t-shirt you get with the Expansion Pass? I had in my head that it was going to be a "handsewn" logo on a red tunic, without the lettering. It's...just a t-shirt. That is very cack.

[Petrousgyre]

1 hour ago, _Pow_ said:

I'm not feeling it, they all look look RuPaul. The Gerudo women though, spooge mcduck! I kinda expected there to be a side quest involving the Gerudo men but I don't think I've met any.

 

That's crazy, the Gerudo women look much more like RuPaul.

 

 

[smac]

1 hour ago, petrolgirls said:

 

I'm not one to find much in the way of titillation in video games but there is something strangely sensual about the fairies. I sense that's probably something I shouldn't admit to.

 

I thought they'd been vaguely disturbing since OoT; there, they appeared to float in uh, somewhat provocative poses. And were similarly well-built.

 

But yeah, that's how fairies should be - not cute little whimsies, but slightly dangerous and full of glamour - every definition of the word.

[Broker]

16 minutes ago, *chin* said:

Christ is that the Switch t-shirt you get with the Expansion Pass? I had in my head that it was going to be a "handsewn" logo on a red tunic, without the lettering. It's...just a t-shirt. That is very cack.

 

Yeah it's hideous, It's also only got 1 defence and can't be upgraded.

[scottcr]

11 minutes ago, smac said:

 

I thought they'd been vaguely disturbing since OoT; there, they appeared to float in uh, somewhat provocative poses. And were similarly well-built.

 

But yeah, that's how fairies should be - not cute little whimsies, but slightly dangerous and full of glamour - every definition of the word.

 

Yeah, the fairies in Zelda games have always been a bit strange - at least since OoT.  They're like Tom Bombadil in Lord of the Rings... massively powerful and a little bit disconnected and maybe not too interested in the goings ons of Hyrule.  And they're all mad horny.

[the_debaser]

Just went and talked to Hestu with no clothes on, in keeping with the sexual nature of the game, pretty funny.

 

Completely stuck on one shrine quest, it's a complete farce. It's called fragmented moments and I need to take some pictures of a broken monument which is scattered around the south east beach area into tiny pieces. It is not fun. I'm tempted to check a guide as I'm wandering around aimlessly. 

[neoELITE]

12 hours ago, Davros sock drawer said:

 

Yeah, loads. But they all break eventually.

 

Edit: I don't know about the Master Sword actually.

 

 

Don't worry, just rest.

[neoELITE]

9 hours ago, SpagMasterSwift said:

I just realised how BotW ties in with The Last Guardian...the bombs man, the bombs! *shudder*

 

Shadow of The Colossus. 

 

[smac]

17 minutes ago, the_debaser said:

Just went and talked to Hestu with no clothes on, in keeping with the sexual nature of the game, pretty funny.

 

Completely stuck on one shrine quest, it's a complete farce. It's called fragmented moments and I need to take some pictures of a broken monument which is scattered around the south east beach area into tiny pieces. It is not fun. I'm tempted to check a guide as I'm wandering around aimlessly. 

 

Yeah, I think I found two pieces of that - he mentions two areas they could have reached, which is something like half the entire beach and takes hours to search. I tied it in with getting 50 stacks of wood to keep my favourite builder happy, but even so, was tedious.

 

I'm currently searching for a third fossil for some scientists, who say 'Oh, but in order to survive up in the mountains it must be in a deep cave somewhere'. i.e. not visible on the map like the other two are. Thanks a bunch, fellas.

[neoELITE]

This is apparently real. That's a Shrine - surely.

 

[RaoulSilva]

37 minutes ago, the_debaser said:

Just went and talked to Hestu with no clothes on, in keeping with the sexual nature of the game, pretty funny.

 

Completely stuck on one shrine quest, it's a complete farce. It's called fragmented moments and I need to take some pictures of a broken monument which is scattered around the south east beach area into tiny pieces. It is not fun. I'm tempted to check a guide as I'm wandering around aimlessly. 

 

They arent that far away and glow in the dark, but one is still quite hard to see.

[buizel]

5 hours ago, *chin* said:

Christ is that the Switch t-shirt you get with the Expansion Pass? I had in my head that it was going to be a "handsewn" logo on a red tunic, without the lettering. It's...just a t-shirt. That is very cack.

 

Now we paying just to advertise the Switch in a fucking virtual world.

[the_debaser]

4 minutes ago, RaoulSilva said:

 

They arent that far away and glow in the dark, but one is still quite hard to see.

 

I'll try again tomorrow, if it takes more than 10 minutes I'm gonna cheat. I found one that was near him and another that was in the water beside some rocks. Maybe if I use my camera it might tell me where it is?

[RaoulSilva]

16 minutes ago, the_debaser said:

 

I'll try again tomorrow, if it takes more than 10 minutes I'm gonna cheat. I found one that was near him and another that was in the water beside some rocks. Maybe if I use my camera it might tell me where it is?

 

Ok, the last one is the one that's hard to see. They're all at sea/ground level.

[macosx]

I bought the xpansion pass today. I don't want it to end

[scottcr]

1 hour ago, the_debaser said:

 

I'll try again tomorrow, if it takes more than 10 minutes I'm gonna cheat. I found one that was near him and another that was in the water beside some rocks. Maybe if I use my camera it might tell me where it is?

He tells you where each on is!