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Ridley Scott's Prometheus - Sequel gets new writer

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if the sequel doesn't have a scene with the head of Michael Fassbender going down on the girl then they're missing an enormous opportunity for the lulz.

Considering he played Frank Sidebottom, I reckon he'd be practically demanding that happened!

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Turns out this is so much better if you read it as a Space Jam sequel about aliens who dunk seven balls at once, tangentially about Weyland Inc trying to offload some incompetent personnel without paying severance money.

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I watched it too, for the second time, and one thing I realised on this viewing, on top of all its other problems, was how boring it is.

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Peter Weyland and Film as a Consumer Product - this one has a decent stab at putting "terrible writing" aside and reasoning about why the characters behave so recklessly

Makes a lot of sense. The absolute best way to guarantee speedy success of a critical mission is to hire cartographers who can get lost in a corridor, biologists who conveniently forget about the existence of all the things that can kill you besides lack of oxygen, etc, etc. It's a miracle the dozy twats made it off earth in the first place.

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Like the guy says, it worked. They got all the way to the Engineers. So maybe it was just Weyland's master plan. Admittedly every single bit of progress they made was because of David, and everything the human crew did made things worse.

Oh, and he's not a cartographer, he's a geologist. He just happens to be the only guy who thought to bring any sort of mapping equipment.

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That's a pretty weak justification. Most of them seemed so incompetent that it was only blind luck that they made it that far, certainly not by their own design. Or anyone else's, bar the scriptwriters.

There's only so far the whole 'Weyland was dying so wanted to take risks' will go. Sure, you want to expediate everything that you can, but you're not going to find a cure if your intrepid crew get killed the moment they step off the ship, even if you view them as expendable overall. There's risk taking, and then there's totally unecessary risk taking.

And also, if it's either find a cure and extend life or die within a matter of days, surely you'd hire the very best team money could buy. I don't think you could describe many of the bunch as that. I know in an earlier script prior to edits, it described how they avoided getting the creme de la creme since they didn't want to draw attention to the mission, but since that was cut, you can't really take that into account.

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Oh, and he's not a cartographer, he's a geologist. He just happens to be the only guy who thought to bring any sort of mapping equipment.

Which he knew how to deploy but not read..?

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It's pretty sad that the crew in Alien, sent on a detour and whining the whole way, manage to be a more convincing exploration team than a group of hand-picked experts. You're hamstrung in dialogue by the fact that the guys in Prometheus have never met, so you can't have the standard post-freezer meet-and-greet, but surely they don't have to be so petulantly indifferent to each other and their mission? Give us some sense that they even give a shit, or if they don't, give us a sense why.

Is this kind of space travel so common that everyone on board is indifferent to it? Okay, well, if you're doing that, surely it's like that for some plot reason, right? Could this be useful in the world building? Ridley says the planet from Alien is literally one moon over - is that close, or far away to this crew? Where might their rescue come from? Can they even call for help?

It doesn't bother me that Lindelof doesn't answer these sorts of questions in the movie so much that he doesn't seem to have even asked them himself. For the master of the mystery box narrative he doesn't strike me as very inquisitive about the worlds he builds.

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It's a shit film and everything about it is shit and everyone involved with it should feel shit.

I get angry just thinking about it. Huge steaming pile of shit that it is.

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Imagine being so stupid that you wasted hours of your life desperately writing defensive articles about why PROMETHEUS was a great film but only really managed to communicate that you're a fucking moron.

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It's a shit film and everything about it is shit and everyone involved with it should feel shit.

I get angry just thinking about it. Huge steaming pile of shit that it is.

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I've just watched this for the first time and absolutely loved it. I'm not trawling through 136 pages of opinions, so can someone sum up why everyone seems to hate this movie, please?

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Awful (and very stupid) characters, embarrassing dialogue, a nonsense, dull plot that doesn't really go anywhere, and sub-Bad Grandpa old man make-up.

 

It looks gorgeous and has some interesting ideas, however.

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