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The Apprentice

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Unbelievably I have never watched The Apprentice before, caught it last night and I think I'll be in for the series. So these people they have chosen, are they supposedly the creme de la creme of the applicants or just who they thought would make good television?

I can't help but cringe massively when it comes to the showdown at the end between the people up for a sacking, it just turns into a complete bitch fest, and Deborah scared me with her cold, emotionless killer eyes!

Last nights show was really enjoyable and as sitcoms go it's pretty good :D

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ANITA016_FULLV2-large_final.jpg

You know when a parent's trying to get their kid to eat something they don't like, and they rearrange the vegetables on the plate to make eyes, nose and a mouth?

Her face is them doing that blindfolded.

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So these people they have chosen, are they supposedly the creme de la creme of the applicants

So goes the official story.

Or "show the most potential"

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The apprentice, like all other "reality" stuff, is so totally staged it just doesn't make sense.

If a load of numpty's burst into my showroom and offered to clean my cars for £100 each i'd tell them to fuck off.

Also, i'd let them nowwhere near my Ferrari's especially since they claim to be cleaners and they don't know how to use the kit they bring.

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Best bit for me was Nick's attempt to stab Debra in the back "There were 10 cars sitting in the showroom, three feet away... that's £100"

Debra the Disruptive will not last long, nor will Monah the Moaner. Anita was bad, but surely the TEAM MANAGER should have been more aware of how much they were spending?

Mr. Braces has to go. Phillip had better watch out he doesn't double-cross the wrong person, and Howard Crater-Face reminds me so much of "Matt Lucas" from the last series with his whining...

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Well this show has gone seriously downhill, what a bunch of ugly tossers. No interesting characters and no older candidates. I won't be watching this anymore.. utter dross.

The first episode's always a bit less captivating than the rest, you haven't had the chance to truly hate someone yet and/or side with the underdog

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Yeah, but it always helps you take an instant dislike to some of them when they spout nonsense like "I'm a rough, tough cream puff from New York" and "Don't think I'm a dizzy blonde" and "I'll give 110%"

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Well this show has gone seriously downhill, what a bunch of ugly tossers. No interesting characters and no older candidates. I won't be watching this anymore.. utter dross.

Hahaha, OK then.

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Yeah, but it always helps you take an instant dislike to some of them when they spout nonsense like "I'm a rough, tough cream puff from New York" and "Don't think I'm a dizzy blonde" and "I'll give 110%"

Candidates who say that should be immediately fired, and forfeit any right they have to go on the BBC2 "You're Fired" show and be put on an alternative "You're Shit" show where people just point and laugh at them for 30 minutes.

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Candidates who say that should be immediately fired, and forfeit any right they have to go on the BBC2 "You're Fired" show and be put on an alternative "You're Shit" show where people just point and laugh at them for 30 minutes.

Absolutely. I thought nobody had said it for once, until the missus pointed out that it was in one of their opening spiels while I was making a cuppa. But surely you can give 110%, say, by doing 10% extra on your contractual working hours...no? :(

The blonde who's mouth crawls and stretches over to where her right cheek should be when she talks: To be fair to her, it only really did that noticeably when she was talking into a phone. It's very odd, it's almost as if it's alive and is straining towards objects that come near it, trying to get a munch. She's not going to last, as her only skill seemed to be parroting-back what Sugar says in the boardroom.

Can't work out if the woman with the long brownish/red hair who didn't speak (apart from offering up some weird team name suggestion) is fanciable or not.

Good first episode though, even though there can't be any serious aim to find people who would actually be good for whatever job Alan's got in mind for the winner. It has to be just for entertainment. I reckon Alan must just ensure there's one, maybe two people in there he'd like and the rest are fodder for us to sit at home and laugh cruelly at.

Oh, and Anita scrubbed up from 'AIIIIEEEEEEEE MY EYES! THE GOGGLES, THEY DO NOTHING!' to 'Ugh, oh-no...urgh...BLUUUUURRRFFFFF!' for the You're Fired show.

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Absolutely. I thought nobody had said it for once, until the missus pointed out that it was in one of their opening spiels while I was making a cuppa. But surely you can give 110%, say, by doing 10% extra on your contractual working hours...no? :(

Of course, it would depend on what the 110% was referring to. An ambiguous statement like "Let's give 110%" means nothing without a unit of measurement.

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The apprentice, like all other "reality" stuff, is so totally staged it just doesn't make sense.

If a load of numpty's burst into my showroom and offered to clean my cars for £100 each i'd tell them to fuck off.

Also, i'd let them nowwhere near my Ferrari's especially since they claim to be cleaners and they don't know how to use the kit they bring.

I was cringing at that bit because I was just waiting for someone to put the pressure washer through the window.

I do think this is going to be the best series yet though for comedy.

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The apprentice, like all other "reality" stuff, is so totally staged it just doesn't make sense.

If you look closely at the last boardroom section from last night you'll see facial continuity errors between the different camera angles. They take multiple takes of these 'reality' scenes! Presumably they need to stop recording all the time so Sir Alan can lift a cheek off his chair and do a welky wet fart.

I hate the way the shows made, I hate all the manufactured shitty pauses and daft fucking reaction shots spliced in from 5 months ago. I hate all the dipping in an out of Alan Sugar's audio they do to make him sound less like a doddering old fuck.

It's a load of wank, I'm not watching it again.

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If you look closely at the last boardroom section from last night you'll see facial continuity errors between the different camera angles. They take multiple takes of these 'reality' scenes! Presumably they need to stop recording all the time so Sir Alan can lift a cheek off his chair and do a welky wet fart.

It's not that, it's the editting - the actual Boardroom is meant to be hours long.

Much prefer the American apprentice, however, anyone catch Celebrity Apprentice over the states - proper lol funny.

Seasons 1,2 and to a lesser extent 3 were really good. Since then it's just descended into "Showbiz!". I can't stand the celebrity versions (but still watch :(.

The last "proper" one (In LA) went really "Reality". The losing team had to sleep outside in tents, while the winning team got the mansion for a week until next task :(

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If you look closely at the last boardroom section from last night you'll see facial continuity errors between the different camera angles. They take multiple takes of these 'reality' scenes! Presumably they need to stop recording all the time so Sir Alan can lift a cheek off his chair and do a welky wet fart.

I hate the way the shows made, I hate all the manufactured shitty pauses and daft fucking reaction shots spliced in from 5 months ago. I hate all the dipping in an out of Alan Sugar's audio they do to make him sound less like a doddering old fuck.

The only time they re-film anything is during the final show where the winner is decided in order to keep things as under-wraps as possible.

This way, the guys in post-production won't know who has won the show.

It's the editing that makes it look like you describe.

It's a load of wank, I'm not watching it again.

So you've watched the last four series and after one episode of this series you don't like it anymore, or you'd never watched it before?

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It's not that, it's the editting - the actual Boardroom is meant to be hours long.

Seasons 1,2 and to a lesser extent 3 were really good. Since then it's just descended into "Showbiz!". I can't stand the celebrity versions (but still watch :D.

The last "proper" one (In LA) went really "Reality". The losing team had to sleep outside in tents, while the winning team got the mansion for a week until next task :(

hahah when they moved location right, went proper shit I thought. Really liking the celebrity Apprentice only because Donal Trump is the man and Ivanka :(

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If you look closely at the last boardroom section from last night you'll see facial continuity errors between the different camera angles. They take multiple takes of these 'reality' scenes! Presumably they need to stop recording all the time so Sir Alan can lift a cheek off his chair and do a welky wet fart.

I hate the way the shows made, I hate all the manufactured shitty pauses and daft fucking reaction shots spliced in from 5 months ago. I hate all the dipping in an out of Alan Sugar's audio they do to make him sound less like a doddering old fuck.

It's a load of wank, I'm not watching it again.

You should watch the usa version if you want continuity errors! The whole first season in the board room trump obviously didn't say what he wanted too so it plays this pre recorded bit of audio over the top (which sounds nothing like any of the other audio in the boardroom) with the camera looking at the contestants, who kind of show expressions which might have something to do with what he actauly never said! I loved all of the uk series and all of the american ones, but I really didn't like this first episode at all. Plus the american one has got trump in it! you gotta love a guy who shouts every word out of his mouth!

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Seems to be quite a few muppets in this series already. I'd imagine the ones who didn't get much screen time turn out to be pretty good a few eps in. Should make for a great series. Suralan's opening seemed a bit (poorly) scripted though.

Regardless of the 'I have killed and will do so again' pic on Yasmina's bio page, she looked a bit of alright to me last night. The white shirt/pencil skirt combo always does it for me.

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