GTA:IV Anectdotes thread

[McSpeed]

Brilliant 'date' with Little Jacob just now: he rang me to go to Strip Club, but I decided to stop at the Cluckin' Bell, where he got all "Sweet, Cluckin'n Bell! I have da munchies, ya now wat am sayin man". He still wanted to go the the hookers after that, but I got a wanted level 3 for shooting some homies on the way.

Next: we're on the bridge from the (eastmost) south to north island, where we got surrounded by cops. He got shot, kind of ending the 'date', but it gave me a thumbs up for Jacob's like / respect. I drove back to my safe house, where I got a call from him that he had just been let out of the hopital and would be waiting outside. He asked me to pick him up, I said yes, but went indoors to save. When I woke up, I got a very angry text message...

Did I already mention it started to rain like mad just before I entered my safehouse?

[Fry Crayola]

Just had my first "pass the joypad, cause mayhem" session. A mate had stolen a car with not one, but two passengers inside, screaming for safety. He was on a road we knew contained a unique jump, so we urged him to go for the jump and bail in mid-air, leaving the poor fellows hurtling towards their doom.

He did as instructed and in slow motion, Niko Bellic ditched the vehicle as it sailed through the Liberty City sky. Unfortunately for poor Niko, he didn't see the pole in time to stop it smashing off his skull just as he exited the car, and he span his way to oblivion and smashed against the pavement below.

[bobontheway]

I just finished a random team deathmatch game. There were four teams and at one point there was a huge gun fight between the orange team and the purple team (my team). I came hurtling down the road in a sports car only to be shot with a rocket launcher. As my car blew up it went flying straight into the entire orange team, killing them all. A huge cheer went up over the voice comms as my team went to grab the cash, I spawned just in time to see a newly respawned member of the orange team come speeding down the road wiping out the three celebrating members of my team.

I love this game

[elmo]

Walking down the road and i hear a voice in the distance. At first i thought it was someone listening to talk radio in their car but i turned a corner and there is this crazy bloke with a beard screaming about jesus and how the end of the world is coming.

I smiled. Pulled out my knife and slowly stabbed him to death.

It made my day

[Chadruharazzeb]

I love the fact that when you go for a drink (or whatever) with Jacob loads of weed smoke come bellowing out of the car when you get out.

[christaylor]

I walked out of my safehouse and stepped out into the road and got sideswiped by a police car! Staggered back to my feet and glared at the policemen who both sat there, po-faced until I walked away.

Now I look both ways before crossing the road.

[Ben]

I decided to shoot up the flat a bit to see what was destroyable (the radio works after two pistol shots, although the reception takes a nosedive - a third shot put it out of it's misery). After getting bored of that, I left the safehouse to be greeted in the lobby by a shotgun toting gang member who presumably was alerted by all the gunfire and wasn't too happy. I'd unequipped my weapon so gave him a swift kick in the nads then delivered some shotgun justice of my own, leaving his bloody corpse just inside the front door.

[StephenM]

This is hardly an anecdote, but the moment I really fell for this game was in a storm, rain everywhere looking great, just driving around with little jacob, and 'Inner City Blues' comes on. It was perfect.

[ChrisN]

I just found 3 Molotovs so I had a little fun blowing the crap out of the street from a safe distance.. the cops arrived so I hopped in my car and drove away through the wreckage. As I did I clipped something that was still burning and my front wheel caught fire ... 10s down the road the tire blew out.

[karellen]

Just did a mission where I had to go kill someone at a train platform:

I confronted him and he ran across the tracks just as a train went through, leaving me on the platform with his bodyguard.

After he was quickly dispatched I jumped across the tracks only to see the target reaching the bottom of the stairs and hopping into a nice red sports car.

I give chase, steal a car, catch up to him, pull out my machine-gun and shoot him in the back of the head through his rear windscreen.

He dies instantly and his car screeches to halt, and is slumped forward onto the steering wheel with the horn blaring, blood covering the windscreen.

I pull his body out of the car and take it for myself. I am on my way home, spot a filthy harlot, so I pick her up and procure her top priced service.

Just as I am reaching the "vinegar strokes" what comes on the radio but R. Kelly's "Bump and Grind"!

[mmcg]

I stopped my car in the middle of the road earlier and some woman ran into the back of me. Seeking vengeance, I got out, walked to her door and shotgunned her right in the face. Her body slumps forward and presses the horn, and the shots that I fired scared a taxi driver stuck behind us, so the driver gets out and runs down the road, only to get rammed by a car coming the opposite way.

And when I was driving on my way to kill Playboy X, there was some mad opera on the radio. Really pumped me up.

[Aphex Tim]

I'm worried about my relationship with Michelle. I was concerned that our regular date of some fried food then back to hers for a shag was getting a little bit stale so I thought i'd spice things up a bit and take her out to a bar. Now when we finished she's not touched a drop but I can hardly walk i don't know what her problem is but the girl just didn't want to seem to party with me.

Anyway being in no fit state to drive i figure i'd hail a cab however I accidently chucked the driver out right in front of two cop cars who didn't take kindly to this. In the ensuing chaos some shots may have been fired and before you know it i'm up to a 3 star wanted rating and very nearly dead.

I hop into the nearest car I can find and go back to pick up Michelle who's just standing there doing nothing - seriously what's her problem? - and off we set crashing into cars left right and centre trying desperately to lose the filth. A chase of around 5 minutes ensues and by the end my car is on fire. So we jump out and hop into an SUV. Our gettaway car explodes in flames killing at least two more pedestrians and probably putting the death toll from our date to about 20 and my wanted level finally disappears.

Michelle has been oddly quiet after her outbursts over my driving and we're setting off now to take her home when she says 'i'm bored please take me home'.... I mean come one - what more does this woman want? How much more excitement can I give her?

I'm telling you I don't think the relationship's going to last.

Still she did give me a bonk when we got back to hers though.....

[bigbrick]

i took michelle to a strip club, she didn't seem too enamoured with the idea.

i tried to liven things up by getting up on one of the podiums with the pole dancer and was enthusiastically encouraged to leave the building by the security.

we get outside and midway through a scrap with 3 bouncers she throws a strop at me and goes home, leaving the bouncers to kick the shit out of me.

fucking bitch.

[McSpeed]

i took michelle to a strip club, she didn't seem too enamoured with the idea.

i tried to liven things up by getting up on one of the podiums with the pole dancer and was enthusiastically encouraged to leave the building by the security.

we get outside and midway through a scrap with 3 bouncers she throws a strop at me and goes home, leaving the bouncers to kick the shit out of me.

fucking bitch.

You'll be in for quite something after you've collected a bag of cocaine.

To many fucking 'anecdote' moments in this game. Though a lot of them are somewhat scripted, as in great moments in the missions and various spoken lines. Also, playing for about 8 hours on one day makes you forget awesome things pretty easily, because there are so much of them

[mr_woo]

Nicked a taxi earlier whilst a male passenger was still in the back, I was driving around like a madman listening to the radio and during one the skits when someone says 'I don't know your meaning of sodomy but here's mine!' the male passenger, with perfect timing, screamed just as that was finished being said. I then burst out laughing and lost control of the car ploughing into a police car and just fancied a shootout leading to a 3 star rampage.

[FishyFish]

Was heading back to the apartment in a shitty car I'd picked up from somewhere and didn't particularly want to keep, so I decided to floor the accelerator, aim at an oncoming car, and then leap to safely to watch the resulting smash. Somewhat unfortunately however, I jumped out of the car just as I was passing another parked vehicle, meaning that Nico hit it with his head at about 70mph, instantly killing him and robbing me of the planned carnage.

[Marzipan Travolta]

Niko was very drunk while playing this earlier and only had a tiny bit of health left.

Staggering around, trying to get a kebab or something. I stubbed my toe on a dustbin and died.

[Jolly]

This is hardly an anecdote, but the moment I really fell for this game was in a storm, rain everywhere looking great, just driving around with little jacob, and 'Inner City Blues' comes on. It was perfect.

I had a similar experience. I was on my way to murder someone I wasn't so sure I should be murdering, got in a car, it started chucking it down and Philip Glass came on the radio.

It seemed so foreboding. Like I was just about to do something terrible.

[TheSlugFormerlyKnownAsNap]

Walking down the road and i hear a voice in the distance. At first i thought it was someone listening to talk radio in their car but i turned a corner and there is this crazy bloke with a beard screaming about jesus and how the end of the world is coming.

I smiled. Pulled out my knife and slowly stabbed him to death.

It made my day

Yeah, I do that all the time! There's often a loony preacher on the other side of the road from my safehouse, and whenever he's there I walk up to him, draw my knife and stab him to death while screaming 'TAKE THAT VELOS!' over and over again, cackling like a maniac and stabbing him over and over and over and over again. Then, when the ambulance arrives, I stab them too.

[Mr.Crowley]

Was heading back to the apartment in a shitty car I'd picked up from somewhere and didn't particularly want to keep, so I decided to floor the accelerator, aim at an oncoming car, and then leap to safely to watch the resulting smash. Somewhat unfortunately however, I jumped out of the car just as I was passing another parked vehicle, meaning that Nico hit it with his head at about 70mph, instantly killing him and robbing me of the planned carnage.

Bailing out in this game is risky business, I must have killed myself at least half the times I've decided to jump ship.

[T Pot]

On multiplayer (before i set up my player model, so i was the woman) i stabbed an old man. He then turned around and said

"Least i still got my face, that gives you somewhere to sit"

[Monkeyboy]

Roman and me go out to a strip joint, all's well. We get back to the apartment so I can drop him off and the bastard punches me out of the car. Cunts getting it next time

The same thing happened to me yesterday. I think it's maybe the passenger side was blocked, and it was the only way to get out. But it was still amusing to see them through the windscreen, exchanging goodbyes, only for Roman to suddenly flip out.

[Meers]

Bailing out in this game is risky business, I must have killed myself at least half the times I've decided to jump ship.

Indeed. The amount of times I jumped out of a burning car at full speed, only to smack against the bumper of an incoming car, can't be counted on 2 hands anymore!

And LOL @ Nap.

[christaylor]

I walked into a train station, and as a train was coming in I casually pushed someone onto the tracks.

He scrambled about for a few seconds trying to climb back up, then the train hit him at full pelt, dragging him along and crushing him betwix train and platform.

he kindly left his wallet on the platform for me too.

[Meers]

That's just evil, Chris.

[christaylor]

That's just evil, Chris.

Yeah, sorry.

It was dead funny though.

[Spacehost]

Another Michelle/ booze related one- after my first drunken night out with her I decided to play it safe and call a cab. After navigating Nico up to the kerb and keeping him balanced enough to look around for a taxi, I spy one coming down the road, so stab L1 to hail it. "HELLO YELLOW CAR!", cries Nico, just in time to fall off the kerb, right under the cab and get two wheels over his head.

I think taking the car would've been safer...

[Yoshimax]

Another Michelle/ booze related one- after my first drunken night out with her I decided to play it safe and call a cab. After navigating Nico up to the kerb and keeping him balanced enough to look around for a taxi, I spy one coming down the road, so stab L1 to hail it. "HELLO YELLOW CAR!", cries Nico, just in time to fall off the kerb, right under the cab and get two wheels over his head.

I think taking the car would've been safer...

That's brilliant

I took Packie's sister (Kate or Karen ?) to the bar for drinks and before entering she commented on the fact she's from a family of drinkers. Cue leaving establishment and I notice she's absolutely arseholed bouncing into anything in her way - We get in the car (glad I didn't try to hail a cab having read spacehosts encounter) and on the way back in the car she turns into a stereotypical psycho-drunk-female - starts off nice enough before descending into self loathing and cursing me to bits "you fucking killer bastard" before she bursts into tears - It was fucking amazing.

[Meers]

Yeah, sorry.

It was dead funny though.

Your wats wrong with da world, etc...

[Dingleberry]

Michelle hates me. She sent me a text telling me not to call her.