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The Escapist: Zero Punctuation


Jarik
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For grown up developers to not produce even a generic sequel that would satisfy fans in the time it would take a child to finish high school, reach adulthood, go on to complete a degree in games programming , find a job, work their way up through the ranks to develop a fantastic new IP, followed by several sequels, get married, have kids and raise them, is pretty lame.

There are people posting here that hadn't even developed speech when DNF first went into production.

Funniest one for ages.

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Massive egotism? This was the game that the developers have been so quiet about for the last few years that most people were shocked at how much material there was when it all leaked the other week, having assumed it was just a running joke at this point.

And equally shocked when it became apparent that they had spent $20m on the thing and it still wasn't done. DNF is nothing but a testament for developers who've had successes before to get drunk on their own egos. It's this decade's Daikatana.

A game that was funded independently by 3DRealms, on a warchest that they made from developing (Duke series), funding (Max Payne, Prey) and publishing (Wolf3D) successful games for well over a decade.

And who therefore should have shown a lick of sense. They took all of the profits from a series of very successful deals (this is mostly the work of Scott Miller, the company president and all-round smart puppy) and pissed it up a wall. It's essentially as though the company had two minds, one which figured out how to do smart deals like Max Payne (that was Scott) and the other who only knew how to get so lost in dev projects that it could only spend like crazy. Prey also wasn't all that and certainly didn't sell like all that, so clearly the company's development wing was in trouble. The extent of that trouble has only recently become clear.

It's a bit of spite which might have worked aimed at a target such as, say, Ion Storm in the 90s - genuinely wildly overpromising and spending publishers' money foolishly.

But it's abundantly clear that Yahtzee doesn't care about the accuracy of his targets at this point. Once he reserved hilarious outpourings of bile for the likes of Sonic Team, now any game he can overstate a few cheap shots about gets described as being written by idiots, for idiots and (where applicable) on a platform that he 'hates'.

It's the sort of drivel children write on GameFAQs. And because there's 200 banner-clicking idiots for every person quietly annoyed that he's wasting his talent, it will just get worse. Like Ctrl-Alt-Del, ironically.

The point is not just having a few entertaining pot-shots for larfs, it's about constructing a coherent argument. His central argument seems to be that 3DR, like Romero before them, is one of those developers that got a free pass for a long time where may other more sensible, sane developers would have managed to put out a sequel in no time at all, that the problem of over-reaching developers isn't just noble ambition run afoul. It's crazed egos swamped in fantasies about how awesome their game is going to be if they just get enough money and time and technlogy and so on. His whole review is about tearing apart that fantasy.

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Sure, if you believe the highly questionable assertion that 3DR were working on the game continuously since it was announced, and the actually false one that they were taking a third party's money that could have been used to give poor disadvantaged developers without "connections" a shot.

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Sure, if you believe the highly questionable assertion that 3DR were working on the game continuously since it was announced, and the actually false one that they were taking a third party's money that could have been used to give poor disadvantaged developers without "connections" a shot.

That I've been able to determine, they were indeed working on it all that time. At some points scaling down to complete other work (like Prey) but at other times going full bore (about 30 people) before changing engines or whatever. $20m doesn't spend itself. Well unless I gets me hands on it.

They did take some at one point, but not comparatively much, 3rd party money according to their own account. Take Two is suing over the $12m or so that they paid for publishing rights but it's very unclear at the moment where that $12m landed exactly. 3DR say not them. That's why TT wouldn't give them any more money to finish Duke, because in their view they're out by a lot more than 3DR say they are.

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I'm not telling that I don't care much for you opinion - I'm telling you NO-ONE cares much for it ;)

What you said was amazingly fatuous - Penny Arcade is a Marmite thing for sure, but for 2 guys who started off drawing a cartoon to end up running the 2nd largest (at one point the largest and arguably the most 'fan based') gaming convention in the world - and a hugely influential game-related charity as well - they HAVE to be doing something right... To write-off what they do as 'not funny' suggests you're so far from the point as to be without hope of ever finding it - frankly...

No - you leapt to that conclusion - I just suggested that you could go too far in not explaining things to the player - there's a MASSIVE difference - the world is not just black and white - things are just not 'funny' and 'not funny' - tutorials are not 'good' and 'bad'...

You're either still in middle school or a Daily Mail reader unculcated with the idea that the whole world can be categorised into good/bad or "causes cancer"/"cures cancer" ;)

TOO MANY DASHES

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Wait, I thought Yahztee hated pointless generic sequels that have only been made for the sole purpose of cynically grabbing cash from a mildly stupid public

As damage limitation they'd probably have been better off releasing something rather than nothing, unless what they'd produced over the past 12 years was so piss-poor it would have ended all their careers.

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That I've been able to determine, they were indeed working on it all that time. At some points scaling down to complete other work (like Prey) but at other times going full bore (about 30 people) before changing engines or whatever. $20m doesn't spend itself. Well unless I gets me hands on it.

They did take some at one point, but not comparatively much, 3rd party money according to their own account. Take Two is suing over the $12m or so that they paid for publishing rights but it's very unclear at the moment where that $12m landed exactly. 3DR say not them. That's why TT wouldn't give them any more money to finish Duke, because in their view they're out by a lot more than 3DR say they are.

From what I've heard the $12m was for publishing rights which Take Two paid Infograms.

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I'm not telling that I don't care much for you opinion - I'm telling you NO-ONE cares much for it ;)

Actually, I've found Compass' many posts to be not only insightful and intelligent, but a joy to read. Even when he disagrees with me.

Yours John, well, I need to click the button that says "You've chosen to ignore this user" ;)

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Actually, I've found Compass' many posts to be not only insightful and intelligent, but a joy to read. Even when he disagrees with me.

Yours John, well, I need to click the button that says "You've chosen to ignore this user" :)

Yeah that post where he says Bangai-O Spirits is shit and that The World Ends With You is one of the best games on the DS in the past 2 years was the most insightful thing I've ever read.

As for this weeks Zero Punctuation, brilliant stuff ;)

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The World Ends With You is one of the best games of the past several years, not just on DS. And Bangai-O Spirits is indeed a travesty compared to the original.

I have plenty of controversial opinions, but those don't really qualify. Try harder, pls.

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Yeah that post where he says Bangai-O Spirits is shit and that The World Ends With You is one of the best games on the DS in the past 2 years was the most insightful thing I've ever read.

He did?! I must have missed those posts, but hearing that I'm nominating Compass for rllmuk poster of the year.

TWEWY is an astounding game, the kind of rare gem which makes me want to revert to hyperbole like the following: it has a higher concentration of innovation that any other single game this generation. This might be true actually. And not only is it a breath of fresh air, it is hugely fun. Counting the times I left it in scan mode, I clocked over 100 hours. It being overlooked was a travesty of the gaming world.

From the moment I played the US version (I avoided the Japanese release), I thought Bangai-O Spirits was a shocking mess, far removed from the tightly honed and hilarious original, and not worthy of the Bangai-O name.

Or perhaps we're one and the same person... :)

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I was excited about The World Ends With You, but after playing it for a while I couldn't get the hang of the dual-screen combat. Not only could I not keep an eye on both screens at once but I couldn't get the flow of the upper combo strings or get the special moves on the touchscreen to work consistently.

I appear to be the only one to have had this trouble though so it appears i'm just not good enough to play it, which is a shame as I still like the idea of it.

Anyways, this is the ZP thread so i'll just say that I never really believed we'd ever see Duke Nukem Forever as it just seemed so out of date in terms of both the game & the character.

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Doesn't matter now. I found it on Wikipedia. Along with this:

"Heather Mills was approached to help work on the game due to her work with amputees, but demanded a six-figure salary and a starring role in the game. Her offer was rejected."

I hope that's true. :)

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Doesn't matter now. I found it on Wikipedia. Along with this:

"Heather Mills was approached to help work on the game due to her work with amputees, but demanded a six-figure salary and a starring role in the game. Her offer was rejected."

I hope that's true. :)

It even made some national newspapers. She wanted too much money, so they told her to hop it.

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Care to spoiler it for someone who doesn't want to buy the game?

I'll spoiler it for those who can't be arsed to Wikipedia it.

His missing wife is his bionic arm.

I'm not even kidding.

After he finds this out, he goes after his boss (who it turns out is actually the bad guy) then headbutts him repeatedly in a mid-air scrap until said nemesis explodes. Then he falls back down to Earth, apparently to his death.

It makes the ending of Siren: Blood Curse look sensible.

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I'll spoiler it for those who can't be arsed to Wikipedia it.

His missing wife is his bionic arm.

I'm not even kidding.

After he finds this out, he goes after his boss (who it turns out is actually the bad guy) then headbutts him repeatedly in a mid-air scrap until said nemesis explodes. Then he falls back down to Earth, apparently to his death.

It makes the ending of Siren: Blood Curse look sensible.

:o amazing. Now please tell us what the ending the Siren: Blood Curse was!

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