Posts About Nothing

[cubeadvance]

Quite simply, the greatest sitcom of all time. If you disagree, you are wrong.

Now that is out of the way, let's all wax lyrical about how amazing it is. I was watching the JFK/Keith Hernandez episode today, and if that isn't the most perfect creation that has ever been on television, i'll be jiggered. "Back and to the left, back and to the left". It's also incredible how close this runs to an episdoe of Friends.

So anyway, please regale me with tales of your favourite bits, and let's all have a Seinfeld love in.

[BossSaru]

Festivus. A festival for the rest of us.

Just when you thought the "People Fund" bit was the peak of the joke, they threw that bit in.

Anything featuring the Costanza family was great.

[cubeadvance]

"Treating your body like an amusment park"

[pledge]

There are so many brilliant moments that everyone could list something different, in fact you could nearly say something for every episode.

My highlights include

Festivus - Frank shouting his yearly disapointments, and the feats of strength.

Jerry ruining Baboos restaurant business and then landing him in jail.

T-Bone!

When George pretends to be disabled.

When George pretends to have hurt his elbow for a whole show.

A mental Lloyd Braun selling computers in Frank's garage.

Jimmy's sneakers and Kramer visiting the dentist.

[Popo]

"I'm leavin', Jerry's a nut!"

"Sometimes I spell Jerry with a G... AND AN I!"

Erm... I'm drawing a blank

[Daley]

Quite simply, the greatest sitcom of all time. If you disagree, you are wrong.

Now that is out of the way, let's all wax lyrical about how amazing it is. I was watching the JFK/Keith Hernandez episode today, and if that isn't the most perfect creation that has ever been on television, i'll be jiggered. "Back and to the left, back and to the left". It's also incredible how close this runs to an episdoe of Friends.

So anyway, please regale me with tales of your favourite bits, and let's all have a Seinfeld love in.

Firstly yes you are right. Best ever.

Second which episode of Friends?

Thirdly, if anyone didn't have it: Enjoy

Lastly, watched this one last night. Always amazes me how episodes seem to be about nothing but so tightly packed at the same time.

My personal faves have to be The Contest and The Chicken Roaster.

[Popo]

Festivus - Frank shouting his yearly disapointments, and the feats of strength.

"As I rained down blows on him, I realised there had to be a better way"

Frank Costanza has almost ALL the best lines.

[pledge]

Newman arriving to finish off the muffin tops with gallons of milk.

Jerry becoming a postman and doing Newman's round.

George selling Frank's clothes and pretending he died in The Raincoats - "Where the hells my cruise wear!"

[Popo]

Just checked Play, looks like season 7 will be out in time for Christmas!

Good times.

[pledge]

Oof hopefully even sooner R1 then.

An extra extra special boxset of 8 and 9 please like they did with 1/2 and 4/5. (But something better than the tiny puffy shirt, I was expecting a life size one!)

[cubeadvance]

Second which episode of Friends?

They used the concept of Jerry's role reversal in the relationship in the episode where Ross and Phoebe are seeing the divorced couple. And also the one where the guys turn into women. It's not a direct copy, but very similar. I've often thought that watching Friends, there have been some really blatant ones that for some reason I can't remember.

[trickshot48]

"the moops"

[Popo]

Giddy up!

[scruffycat]

Jimmy's sneakers and Kramer visiting the dentist.

Ah, The Jimmy. I saw it for the first time a few months ago and I don't think I have ever laughed so much at an episode before. Pure brilliance.

"Jimmy might have a compound fracture.. Jimmy's going into shock!!"

[Rowan Morrison]

The absolute pinnacle of Seinfeld is Kramer's bus journey with the armed robber.

"You kept making the stops?"

"Well, people kept ringing the bell!"

But running a close second is George's attempt to hoodwink Susan with his Art Vandelay story.

"What does he import?"

"...really big matches?"

And not to mention the many thousands of better moments I've surely forgotten. Oh, Mickey the dwarf in the kid's bed, that's great. Genuinely terrifying.

This is a thread where you could go on forever, though.

"You know Darren, if you had told me twenty-five years ago that I’d be standing here about to solve the world's energy problems, I would have said you were crazy. Now let’s push this giant ball of oil out the window."

"I'm free - because the murderer struck again!"

Etc. etc.

[cubeadvance]

"Mmmmm, boy that Hennigans goes down smooth. And afterwards you don't even smell. That's right folks. I just had three shots of Hennigans and I don't smell. Imagine, you can walk around drunk all day. That's Hennigans, the no-smell, no-tell scotch."

[Daley]

How could I forget:

Serenity NOW!!!!!!

[cubeadvance]

Even though King of Queens is a load of old, smelly badger cock, he is still fantastic.

[Couch Corpse]

Nice thread title.

Anything with the parents, Seinfeld does parents better than anyone else.

"This, is Frank, Costanza"

"Gonna be in the pool, gonna be in the club house, gonna be all over that shuffleboard court!"

Mandelbaum, Mandelbaum, Mandelbaum.......

Kramer's exit from The Contest.

"Is anybody here a marine biologist?"

Jack Klompus.

Jerry's haircut.

Kramer getting a job.

Georges concern for his possibly bulimic girlfriend.

It's gold rllmuk, gold!

[Popo]

I don't wanna be a pirate!

[Couch Corpse]

The absolute pinnacle of Seinfeld is Kramer's bus journey with the armed robber.

"You're Batman"

"I am Batman"

"You know Darren, if you had told me twenty-five years ago that I’d be standing here about to solve the world's energy problems, I would have said you were crazy. Now let’s push this giant ball of oil out the window."

George washing his hands with Jerry's glass of water.

[Daley]

I have to go in a minute but I could stay here all day posting great bits.

I leave you with this.

My fave bit:

MOHEL (the guy doing the Bris) Alright I'm fine, I'm fine. Anyway, we're here to perform the mitzvah of the bris and...

SFX: BABY CRYING

MOHEL ...Is the baby gonna cry like that? Is that how the baby cries, with the loud, sustained, squealing cry,

'cause that could pose a problem. Do you have any control of your child 'cause this is the time to exercise it when baby is crying in that high-pitched, squealing tone that can drive you insane?!!!

MRS. FLICK TAKES THE BABY INT OTHER ROOM. THE MOHEL MASSAGES HIS FOREHEAD.

ELAINE

Did you find the place alright?

Mohel

Did I find it alright? I mean could you send me to a more dangerous neighborhood? I'm dreading walking back to the subway, someone shouldn't crack me over the head and steal my bag, 'accuse I'll be lying there on the street in this neighborhood and people will spit on me and empty my pockets. I'll lie in the gutter like a bum, like a dog, like a mutt, like an animal! God forbid someone should help me or call an ambulance. No, that's too much trouble to pick up a phone and press a few buttons. Ahh!

What's the point.

Elaine

Do you feel alright?

Mohel

(TO ELAINE< INTERRUPTING) Darling, you see where that glass is?

How that glass is near the edge of the table. You got the whole table there to put the glass, why you chose the absolute edge, so half the glass is hanging off the table, you breath and that glass falls over, then you're gonna have broken glass on the carpet, embedded in the carpet fibers, deep, deep in the shag, broken glass, bits of broken glass that you never get out. you can't get it out with a vacuum cleaner. Even on your hands and knees with a magnifying glass, you can't get all the pieces, and then you think you got it all and two years later, you're walkin' barefoot and you step on a piece of broken glass and you kill yourself, is that what you want? I don't think you want that, is it? .. Do you?

[pledge]

Quite a good way to pass the time at work remembering these.

George's attempts to get fired from the Yankees.

All of Poppy:

Not washing his hands

the make your own pizza pie/abortion crossover

urinating on Jerry's sofa

"Hellooo" Uncle Leo and his stories about Geoffrey and the parks department.

[Silent Runner]

Can’t stand ye

My favourite George moment (and by extension my favourite Seinfeld moment) is when he pretends to be a Marine Biologist and ends up pulling a golf ball from a beached whales blow-hole. The reveal at the end when he produces the ball Kramer hit into the sea is priceless.

Some other classic moments:

Any bit involving George and the New York Yankees, building the bed under his desk, quitting his job then coming back as if nothing has happened, eating the cake out of the bin, running into the children’s party with his shirt off, leaving meetings on a high note even if it means leaving after only a few minutes, killing his fiancée, “Zero Zero? No it says ooh, ooh like a monkey” , Jon Voights car and on and on.

[Andy_Why]

I can't remember the specifics of the episode, but one of my favourite scenes involved Kramer and Frank. Frank had bought a pool table and Kramer and him were playing pool. However, earlier that episode Kramer had learned how to keep the crease nice and crisp in his trousers- by taking them off until you absolutely needed to wear them. Having told Frank about this, they were both playing pool trouser-less.

So just as Kramer decides to help Frank with a shot, by bending over behind him - Franks wife walks in... the look on her face is priceless.

Writing that out doesn't do the moment justice in any way, but thats always going to be the case with Seinfeld. It's all about the build up and then that sweet, sweet pay off. What an amazing show.

[cubeadvance]

"Hey, driver. How about we pick up your sister and we have a little fun back here?"

[CrispinG]

All of Poppy:

Not washing his hands

"Poppy was a little sloppy!"

Cosmo Kramer: I got news for you: handicapped people, they don't even want to park there! They wanna be treated just like anybody else! That's why, those spaces are always empty.

George Costanza: He's right! It's the same thing with the feminists. You know, they want everything to be equal... everything! But when the check comes, where are they?

Elaine: What does that mean?

George Costanza: Yeah! Alright, I'm pulling in.

[The Liberal Elite]

The one where kramer goes to the dentist, ends up wearing someone else's shoes and gets Mel Torme singing to him at a benefit for the mentally challenged.

Jimmy's sneakers and Kramer visiting the dentist.

I really should have read the rest of teh thread before replying.

[karellen]

So many of my favourites have already been mentioned but what about when -

Elaine gets a new set of friends who are the Bizzaro versions of Jerry, George and Kramer!

Susan dies from the envelope glue and the whole aftermath - the foundation, George eating blocks of cheese in the nude, Marissa Tomei!!

The Library Cop!!!

Shrinkage!!!!

So many others

[CrispinG]

Kramer's anecdotes in The Van Buren Boys are priceless, too.

"... ruining the very pants I was returning."