Jump to content


  • Content Count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

About Stanshall

Profile Information

  • Gender

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

  1. Stanshall

    Games for Psychopaths

    Never played EDF but I know the MidRes boys are into it. I'll keep an eye out. Cheers.
  2. Stanshall

    Nintendo eShop (Software Chatter)

    Rhythm violence is the phrase the devs used. It's compelling and overwhelming at its best, but its best is definitely on PSVR, and it's equal parts dull and frustrating, too. I'm probably more of an advocate than most, by the way.
  3. Stanshall

    Games for Psychopaths

    Hyrule Warriors! That's the one! Cheers, gents. How could I have forgotten? Apologies if anyone was upset about the wanking glove joke. Just goes to show how much more offensive sexuality is than violence. Anyway, I was just being silly, I obviously do all repairs myself because we don't have a tanner nearby.
  4. Stanshall

    Games for Psychopaths

    I can also recommend Assassin's Creed: Origins, as there appears to be no fail state for executing one villager or citizen after another. The guards come along and they get dispatched with equal contempt and you just keep going, murdering randomly, casually, indiscriminately, generously, pile them up, burn them down and do it all again in the next street along until you feel a cool halo of peace descend onto your boiling scalp. My ceremonial leather ten-pin bowling and wanking glove is still being patched up at the tanners. That's Taizen Hot Gimmick Arcade Mahjong for you.
  5. Stanshall

    Games for Psychopaths

    After a long day at work and a bizarre 4am start, I look forward to getting in and clearing my head with a bit of gaming while my wife watches some shite. Unfortunately, I tend to crave bullet hell shmups and the like which make me more stressed out and basically feel exponentially worse the more I play, the shitter I perform and the more tired I get. It's a nightmarish feedback loop exacerbated by the central heating blazing unnecessarily in every room because it's dropped one degree. In this country, it's not only frowned upon to rampage through the entire postcode with a sawn-off bazooka and a massive hammer to find a few moments of solace, it's actually illegal so let's strike that one off the list before anyone suggests it. In which video games,therefore, can one best mete out cathartic destruction and indiscriminate hatred? It can't be anything too challenging, I've concluded, lest it drag you further down into the tar quagmire of rancour. Equally, if it's too slow paced, thats likely to only delay the inevitable and you might throttle yourself in your own sleep to get it out of your system. I'm normally pretty chilled but not today so I could do with these suggestions before bed time. Thanks.
  6. Stanshall


    Very excited about the M2 ports incoming and hoping DaiOuJou is in the pipeline. In other shmup news, all I play now is Psyvariar Delta. This is properly addictive. Just working on maxing my buzz on stage one because I'm an ichimen bansho. Took me ages to break 1000 buzz and I'm not looking back. It feels like you're constantly flirting with death and the rhythm of levelling up becomes hypnotic. It's more like bullet surfing than grazing. Add me on Switch for some high score antics. Might be time for a dedicated thread...
  7. Let me tell you the story of my Bloodborne platinum. Once upon a time I was playing Bloodborne... (1/38)
  8. Stanshall


    I do play 90% with Pro Controller, yep. I much prefer that to the PS4 pad for shmups but I don't have a proper stick. Maybe it's time to invest. That said, I've got a few S class first stages on Ikaruga in handheld so it's possible to adapt to the quite shit Joycon sticks, it's just not preferable. Speaking overall, there's a large and growing collection of 'proper' shmups on the Switch. Almost all the Psikyo games including Gunbird 2, Zero Gunner 2, Dragon Blaze and Tengai, the top Neo Geo stuff like Blazing Star and Pulstar, then Ikaruga, Psyvariar, Azure Reflections, Danmaku Unlimited 3. There's plenty more besides but these are the highlights for me. I'm still hopeful that M2 will work their magic on Battle Garegga and Ketsui and we'll see where it goes from there.
  9. Stanshall


    Aye, Caladrius Blaze is pretty gross. Half-decent game underneath it but still only half. I can just about tolerate the cutesy witch/maid stuff from Azure Reflections and the girly stuff in Mushihimesama and Dodonpachi DaiOuJou is mild enough to ignore but it was so obnoxious in Caladrius Blaze that I uninstalled and never went back. In very related news, though, I can kind of recommend Sisters Royale, a cute-em-up available on the Japanese Nintendo eShop. Comes to about eight quid or so. It's decent enough. It feels like a very good mobile game shmup. Fuckin hell, talk about a soft sell. Anyway, sod all that. Psyvariar Delta is out in the West this week on PS4 and Switch. Absolutely banging game.
  10. Stanshall

    Paying to Play 'Early'

    When I see the wankers whooping with 'glee' at Alton Towers with their so-called 'Fast Track' passes thinking they're having more fun than me in the queue with my beady eyes fixed upon them, the joke is well and truly on them because I'm not even arsed about the rides, I just like the anticipation. I'd abandon them halfway through if I could, I'm only interested in waiting for the next one.
  11. Again, plenty of summons for me this evening and I finally finished the network test, too. I am in bed slightly under the weather and playing in handheld, and I can't believe how good it is. This is exactly what I had hoped for.
  12. Stanshall


    Totally on the same page. For the sale price, it's pretty good if a little dry. For fifty quid, I'd have been gutted. I got the Cave DLC pack and it basically adds Dodonpachi, Deathsmiles and Ketsui gameplay elements, along with the ships/characters. It's probably the most fun I've had with the game, to be frank. YMMV, though. I'm easily pleased by anything Cave.
  13. I'm awful at SFV, genuinely awful and have hardly put any time in relative to SF4, but I've been most successful by far when just playing total offensive spam, and least successful by far when trying to play solidly, intelligently and punish appropriately. I find that a bit dispiriting.
  14. Which utter homunculus would downvote this post?
  15. And for contrast, I suppose, I played for approximately the same amount of time at various points over the four hour session and was invaded every couple of minutes and invaded others a dozen times. It's just the nature of the stress test, I suppose.

Important Information

We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue. Use of this website is subject to our Privacy Policy, Terms of Use, and Guidelines.