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Calashnikov

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  1. Calashnikov

    Nintendo eShop (Software Chatter)

    Is that imminent Wii Shop closing shnit gonna affect any Virtual Console purchase / download bizness from the Wii U eShop at all? Not that I’ve even got my Wii U plugged in, but if I’ve only got a matter of weeks to buy some GBA Castlevanias outwith ebaying the original carts, I wanna know.
  2. Game of the Year A1. Hollow Knight (Switch) "The amount of content and incredible standard throughout this cheap fucking game simply astounds me. The love that has been poured into the fascinating lore, the ingenuity of the level design, the seemingly simple, yet deep combat system, the boss pattern choreography, the character design, the standard of writing, the music and the sound effects, the beautiful background art - all of it is absolutely god tier to me. The balance between humorous whimsy and unsettling horror throughout is deftly handled. It's a Grimm Fairytale as Metroidvania. A deceptively massive wee game that demonstrates a standard of interlocking design and craft that I'd usually only expect Nintendo or the likes of Fumito Ueda to be capable of delivering, all wrapped up in this wee download that cost me less than the price of a cinema ticket. A fucking classic that I love." A2. Tetris Effect (PS4 / PSVR) "Tetris is arguably the best game of all time. With Tetris Effect, soundcunt Rez Cunt has turned the best game of all time into the best (only?) fully immersive interactive electronic concept album and light-show. The high dose of earnest, seemingly sincere New Age considerations and celebrations of all things pertaining to human evolution, technological advancement, the beauty of nature and the ways in which each of these facets connect caused me to fill my PSVR headset with tears. It played me like a fiddle while I played it like some futuristic Rubik's Cube from heaven. Intertwined and connected, having syneasthesic cosmic trance sex with the quintessential computer game. Fucking yes." A3. Shadow of the Colossus (PS4) "As someone who doesn't really give too much of a fuck about contemporary massive budget AAA games, I'm not usually privy to the latest graphical advancements, and it's not really something I particularly care about, despite working in the visual arts sector in my own career. I'd only played the 'original' SotC within the last couple of years (actually streamed the HD version via a free PS Now trial), and knew it was a great game. Ueda to me is an artist. His design-through-subtraction approach resonates, and I can recognise his Fine Art sculpture training in his game design. I was worried all the souped-up bells and whistles of the PS4 remake would diminish his original vision, but I was amazed to find the game genuinely lifted and improved by the extensive reworking. I spent even more time just roaming the desolate landscape, headphones on, immersing myself in an even more tangible version of Ueda's world. I just remember feeling thankful that BluePoint were afforded the opportunity and budget to lavish so much gloss into remaking such an artistic game. We should feel privileged at being given an adaptation of (what is, in many respects) a pretty clunky old game with a level of polish usually reserved for all the bloated shiny AAA shite that I usually couldn't give a fuck about Biggups, all involved (not least of all for the very reasonable price point as well. Respect). A4. Super Smash Bros. Ultimate (Switch) "It is indeed the Ultimate version of Smash, and pants were pished this Christmas as a result. Big baseball-bat-connection-to-the-face sound-effects all round!" A5. Astro Bot (PSVR) "The '3D platformer done right' is a rare thing indeed, but when one comes round, I often think it must truly be my most favourite gaming genre of them all. Well, this is the most 3D of 3D platformers, and the platforming itself is done right. This is basically the game I always dreamed of playing as a 9 year old boy, and now its here I can actually run around a living cartoon world with a cute little robot buddy, jumping about a land of colour, collecting shiny gold coins. The game I always wanted, and now I want more. Cannot wait to see how this type of game might start to look and feel in the generations to come. It's a milestone." Biggest Disappointment of the Year (game, hardware, or anything else) Z1. Nintendo's E3 Direct Z2. Sony's E3 Conference Z3. Labo dying a death Z4. Playstation Classic Z5. Lack of a decent Virtual Console equivalent for Switch Sound Design of the Year S1. Tetris Effect S2. Hollow Knight S3. Super Smash Bros Ultimate Visual Design of the Year V1. Shadow of the Colossus PS4 V2. Hollow Knight V3. Tetris Effect Writing of the Year W1. Hollow Knight W2. WarioWare Gold (3DS) Gaming Format (System) of the Year F1. PSVR Publisher or Developer of the Year P1. Team Cherry "I paid 'full price' for Hollow Knight at around 15 quid or something like that, and many others will no doubt have been able to buy it for the absolute steal of around 7 banger in recent sales, so I'm giving these boys my Publisher/Dev of the year on the back of that sheer generosity alone. The amount and standard of content within the game (chucking in free DLC to boot) just seals the deal. Just wish there was a physical release of the game that I could buy for the next 3 or 4 loved ones' birthdays that come round. I want to continue supporting this mob for as long as they remain a going concern, off the back of Hollow Knight alone. Can't wait to see what they'll be doing next." Best Supported Game (released pre 2018) of the Year B1. WipeOut Omega Collection (PS4) "That free VR patch is the kindest gesture in gaming that I can think of. They would have been perfectly within their rights to charge full whack for the experience that is WipeOut VR. It utterly transformed the game and delivered the equivalent of a fucking actual top standard theme park ride into my flat, at the cost of nothing. I'd only bought the disc for 11 quid or something last year as well." Your game of the year that didn't come out this year (basically what is your favourite game you played this year that came out in 2017 or earlier) X1. The Witness Best game character of the year C1. Zote the Mighty (Hollow Knight) C2. Hornet (Hollow Knight)
  3. Calashnikov

    Nintendo Switch

    I actually read the words this time. Fucking right, even with that info. “Usually always”. Ya fuckin wank.
  4. Calashnikov

    Nintendo Switch

    I knew I could count on you, ya mad wee cunt
  5. Calashnikov

    Nintendo Switch

    The traditional standard January Direct that we usually always get. Ok, now go get deKaying the above!
  6. Calashnikov

    Nintendo Switch

    Where’s the fucking January Direct? Been Googling all week and the only places talking about it maybe happening are a bunch of right-wing UK tabloids who are blatantly talking shite
  7. You get lost like fuck in it and it’s glorious. A game to tan a bottle of red wine to
  8. Calashnikov

    Stuff that astonishes you about gaming

    PSVR blows my mind every time, but I’ve gotta be honest and say that fuckin’ Mode 7 effects on the SNES still impress me
  9. Calashnikov

    The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild

    It’s one of the stats you get listed whenever there’s a loading screen.
  10. Calashnikov

    Nintendo Mobile : Nearly 3 years have passed

    Stop this.
  11. Calashnikov

    Nintendo Switch

    Nooooooo. But, ok, cheers.
  12. Calashnikov

    Nintendo Switch

    Couldn’t find a specific Nintendo Online thread, so fuckin it in here eh? Anycunt got that Family Account set up? I’m wanting to set one up for me, my two sisters and our cousin in the States. Is that gonna be possible, splitting a multi-member account across regions?
  13. Calashnikov

    Do minigames add anything to a game?

    Some Tekken game a guy at uni had had a bowling game in it. Also, you reminded me of Yakuza’s bowling which, with the Nagoshi connection, shares its lineage with Monkey Bowling - the GOAT minigame.
  14. Calashnikov

    Do minigames add anything to a game?

    Of course it is. Yakuza without the mini game silliness to offset the po-faced melodrama is a Yakuza I don’t want to play. Besides the tonal relief that they provide, that cabaret club side game in Zero was fucking crack.
  15. Calashnikov

    Football Thread 2018/19

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